Tossing Batting Practice…while wondering why anyone who doesn’t root for the Celtics would want to kill Tony Allen…
I apologize for the brief intermission this month, school, and coaching caught up to me a bit, and my creativity just kind of waned. Anyway back to smarmy mundane and sometimes obvious comments about everyday sporting life.
The good news is Allen probably wont have anything to worry about regarding his safety in Chicago for game 6, if his alleged assailant is a Bulls fan. The guy played tonight like he was a BC hoopster circa the late 70s Henry Hill was showering him with coke and hookers.
I have found Paul Pierce to be one of the most frustrating athletes in Boston sports of my lifetime, but even though I hate the little post up at the top of the key, take a dribble and fadeaway move, it worked perfect tonight and I have to tip my cap to him, he certainly came up when the team needed it most.
I have no idea why Vinny Del Negro keeps calling timeouts to draw up plays, it seems pretty rudimentary to me.
Clear out, pick and roll for Rose, spread the floor with Gordon and Salmons and let Rose make a good decision.
Then again he didn’t do that any of the times he called timeout, thus further proving that nobody intelligent has ever come out of Western. Mass.
I got back from class just in time to see Ray Allen foul out, honestly I didn’t think there could have been a more unpredictable revelation, even if you told me Miki Moore had 40 (I mean he has to have scored double figures once in his life on some level right? He is in the NBA?).
But then I saw Stephon Marbury enter for defensive purposes, late in the game and that took home the big teddy bear in the carnival game of guessing the most improbable occurence in a game.
A big thumbs up to Kevin Harlan for the reverse jinx before Miller’s free throws, when he stated the Bulls had made 16 straight from the line.
Joe Buck and Don Orsillo proudly acknowledge your excellent work.
It’s my favorite time of year, playoff time in the NBA and NHL, and one of my favorite aspects of this time of year is the amount of teams that go up 3-0 in a series. Inevitably whenever this happens, the graphic pops up about the teams that have completed the comeback, its usually followed by the Dave Roberts steal, and it gets a little dusty in here.
I appreciate Big Baby Davis and all the hard work he does, but he really can’t finish underneath in traffic. So it’s frustrating that the Celtics don’t realize this and still pass it to him down there.
Not really a lot to say about the Sox right now, I’m loving the depth of our bullpen, though I can’t help but wonder if Papelbon has gotten a little too big for his britches and is maybe coming back to earth a bit.
I refuse to gloat, (a lot) about a series ion April, we’ve won far too many of those over the years, and surely the Yanks pitching will square itself away, as will its offense.
As long as the Devil Rays keep underachieving I’ll feel ok, the regular season is just a daily distraction until September anyway.
It was awesome to see Ellsbury steal home (that’s the kind of in depth analysis you get here at TBP).
I was at the Billy Hatcher steal of home game got to see it develop because I was sitting in the alley between homplate and the first base dugout in the lower bowl, back when it didn’t cost 1/8th of a semester’s tuition at a private university to sit there.
That was one of the coolest things I had ever seen when I was 11 years old.
It's really great to have Julio Lugo back, I mean he dropped that routine double play ball, where he looked like my grandmother trying to catch a fastball, and clearly his karma extended to everything else around the team, especially Lopez dropping the easy flip to lose the game.
Is Julio Lugo spanish for Tony Allen?
As most of you know I went to one of the most liberal schools in America, basically a student body of crazy hippies. While I always assumed all college students tend to be closer to the left in terms of political and social beliefs, but apparently not.
In a class presentation tonight, I heard one girl refer to a crucial Civil War battle as
“when WE lost the war.” I mean 140 years later, they still haven’t gotten over it, so I guess there’s little to no hope I’ll ever recover from the Super Bowl that shall not be named, or the League Championship series that never happened.
I was speechless at first, then had to use every ounce of self restraint not to laugh, or ask a question about the odd use of the word We.
Later in a presentation a kid tried to argue for less gun control, by stating the number of accidental deaths caused by doctors is far greater percentage wise than the number of accidental deaths caused by guns.
I’m still waiting for the answer on number of intentional deaths caused by Doctors relative to guns.
So our old rivals the Carolina Hurricanes will be coming to Boston for the playoffs. I must dust off my Primeau sucks chant from 1998.
Perhaps some little high school miscreants can replace me, Dunneski and Mule throwing super balls on the ice, and lofting paper airplanes in the balcony during this series.
That will be the extent of the hockey analysis for now, I promise of this series lasts longer than four or five games I might know the names of the majority of the players, (spelling probably not) and with it some hockey analysis.
I did have a “they were better in my day” moment the other night when I heard someone compare Milan Lucic (who apparently is neither a pompous eastern European fashion designer, nor a neighborhood in an Italian city) to Cam Neely.
Despite having seen Lucic (sp?) only a handful of times, I am steadfast in my belief that nobody had the power, speed and scoring combination of number 8.
Somewhere Mike O’Connell, a former youth hockey instructor of mine, is somewhat vindicated as Joe Thornton is golfing already again. I hope he’s a scratch golfer at this point in his career, though I’m sure if you put anything of value on the line (i.e. anything but his pride) he’d fold like an accordion.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Monday, April 13, 2009
Not tossing batting practice today…
Instead we’re Taking a Mulligan…..reporting live from Augusta National…because quite frankly I needed a break from Jim Nantz and I wasn’t going to give up The Masters to make it happen…
Being stuck in rural Georgia for the last few months has been a tough life adjustment, but from the moment I accepted my new job, I had secretly hoped I could go see the Masters.
The schedule broke right for me, and the usually exorbitant prices started heading south this week, so the only thing standing in my way were studying for grad school exams I have this week.
I’ve never been the most judicious of students, so of course I chose to roll the dice and take a trip to Augusta.
I left the house at 7:30 and cruised in just under three hours. When you get off the highway I expected a pristine country club setting kind of road, like we have at Brookline.
Instead I found route 1 equivalent complete with a Waffle House and a Hooters. After making a right at the TGI Fridays, I pull onto this quiet tree lined lane with a couple houses and vast gravel parking lots.
Despite the fact the Members of Augusta National are generally rich Captains of Industry, I have to admire their disregard for Capitalism as they offer free parking for everyone.
I get out of my car and look for tickets, a half a mile back towards the highway later I procure one at a reasonable price (i.e. I’m able to keep my first born, and both legs), and now I’m headed back to the course.
Walking in the first thing that strikes you is how peaceful it is, almost no sound except for a few lone birds chirping, almost politely. The trees are towering high, and full of growth, something a hardended New Englander is not used to seeing in early April.
As the temperature warms, I am left with a tough decision about what to do with my long sleeve shirt. As I look around at some of the questionable fashion choices, I determine that I can in fact tie it around my waist, and not look like the biggest snob here.
The British guy in the bright purple and yellow Payne Stewart outfit I cam across later clearly had that honor.
I peruse the pro shop, where I too could own a goofy looking golf hat for a mere $50, or an $80 collared shirt. On the flip side the concession stand again seems to defy Capitalist values, as sandwiches go for a buck and a half, and soda and candy are a dollar. Beers are under three bucks, but I question the point of getting drunk at a golf tournament unless your buddies have raised enough bail money.
Cell phones and cameras aren’t allowed on the premises for obvious reasons, but they treat it like bringing a loaded gun into the club.
If you do need to make a phone call there is a bank of phones in random places that offer free long distance anywhere in the country. Sadly the advent of cell phones has rendered me unable to remember anyone’s number.
After walking through concessions and the pro shop, I see the course itself. It’s kind of like walking through all those shops at Disneyworld. The Magic Kingdom is off in the distance, in this case the leaderboard, and as soon as you get out into the clearing its sort of overwhelming which way to go because people are walking everywhere.
I choose to wander aimlessly and look at some holes as people who have no hope of winning are playing out the string. The first thing that strikes me is that golfers aren’t all that big, I know that’s not shocking news, but even folks who are supposed to be big like Cabrera aren’t.
As I survey the course, the color of green is striking, nothing faded (even the gravel cart path is dyed green) and the grass looks perfect (though trampled after seven days of public access). The azaleas are blooming, and the sand traps are whiter than any Caribbean Beach.
As I see some guys tee off and shoot irons, I’m struck by the fact the sound off the club is not the booming blast it sounds on tv, it’s a simple sound any average guy who hits the ball square can make. However as it whizzes by your head it’s a little unnerving, even though you know its not hitting you.
I head over to the 10th hole and watch a couple groups including Bubba Watson, who is clad in a teal shirt and plaid pants, while sporting a driver that has a hot pink shaft. I have no joke here, I think it speaks for itself.
D.J. Trahan (didn’t know who he was before today either) has a caddy who was sporting a Green Monster sox shirt under the painters coveralls caddies wear. Now one would think this would make him a reasonably friendly or affable man at least to a fellow Sox fan, one would be wrong.
The prevalence of Sox hats throughout the golf course was incredible. I think only Georgia hats were more common (aside from Masters and golf company hats) and not by much. I saw Sox hats of all types, including a Titleist hat with a Sox logo, truly a nation we have on our hands perhaps we can talk to Jerry Remy about a possible secession.
Viva La Revolucion!!!!
I briefly watch Tiger on the practice green. He drills five quick short putts, which only frustrates me more about my short game. However, those are the last five good putts he hits all day.
Had I been made aware of the amount of attractive women who inhabit golf tournaments, I might have applied myself earlier in life. At the very least I think these are things parents should be doing, that’s why Earl Woods superglued clubs to Tiger’s hands. He saw a future Swedish model daughter in law, fame and fortune were secondary. Further proof I was shortchanged growing up.
I choose to follow the group of Tiger and Phil Mickelson, and if they fall out of contention I’ll veer back and check out the final group. But also because nobody pays the big bucks to see Kenny Perry or Angel Cabrera do anything
Tiger opens his round in much the same way I probably would have, by carrying it over the gallery somewhere. Unlike me his second shot carries a tree and lands near the pin to save par.
My first sight of Phil Mickelson, all I could think of as the line in Tommy Boy, “the camera adds a couple of…hundred pounds.”
He’s not all that big, and certainly not pudgy at least not in person. However the pinstriped pants have him looking like a goofy European.
I’m not a fashion cop by any means, but between the fans and golfers, who thinks some of these look good? I saw a guy with gold sneakers, and a magenta collared shirt (collar up), really I demand an investigation.
Mickelson starts a birdie barrage on two, three, five and six and is walking like he knows he’s in a zone.
His par three tee shot on six that sailed over my head and onto the green next to the pin was amazing to see. The crowd is now cheering everything Phil does, including successfully walking from shot to shot.
He’s at seven under and making a real charge, I’m morally obligated to root for any lefty golfer, and this group has gotten interesting and into contention.
In the least improper golf attire for a fan contest, the tattooed white guy in the KG Celtics jersey seems a little out of place, a close second is the bandwagon fan in the Rays jersey.
That strut of Phil’s stopped briefly when he Winged Foot (yes it’s a verb meaning to find the woods with your drive in a major championship while in contention, hey my blog, my rules of grammar). However he hits an incredible iron that drops within two feet of the pin in front of me.
The fact I recognize Jim Furyk by sight from 75 yards away, just proves I watch too much Sportscenter.
Tiger is struggling and jokes are flying in the gallery as Phil has upstaged him, and is smiling ear to ear. I can’t help but wonder when the collapse will come. Tiger flips his putter in frustration after missing a putt on seven. I don’t know by how much because once the pin is gone, I can’t ever find the hole.
Through seven holes, I have yet to perfect the somber golf clap, which is sort of the obligatory applaud after making an easy tap in after failing to make the important putt. Veteran golf fans seem project a monotone boom after a disappointing hole.
I have however perfected the boisterous shriek after Mickelson does something well. His following is getting a little Happy Gilmore-esque.
I elect to get a drink and not follow the duo to eight, like Ron Burgundy I regret this immediately as I see Tiger nail a long eagle putt from the ninth green roughly 700 yards away kinda like being in the opposite endzone at Gillette.
Mickelson again Winged Foots a tee shot seeming a little rattled after Tiger’s eagle. He follows that by finding the bunker from the woods, however he saves par.
While I applaud excellent play, I have to say I enjoy the sufferings of professional golfers and in particular I love seeing a shot that rolls all the way down a steep slope, or a putt that rolls all the way off the green. I get to see Heidi Watney’s anorexic gangly cousin Watney putt one off the ninth, and Mickelson come up short on an approach. I’m sadistic I know, but I feel as though others should feel my pain sometime.
I jump all the way to Amen Corner which is an absolute mob scene, albeit the most polite mob on earth, as everyone says excuse me and genuinely cares about other’s sightlines (this will change later)
Despite the oversized gallery nobody is watching Watney or Stephen Ames play the par 3 12th.
The sightlines at 11 and 12 are among the best in all of the golf world, absolutely the perfect place to play golf. I’m simply not a good enough writer to adequately describe it.
Mickelson has now added a new shot to future Major blog verbiage, as he Augusta’s his tee shot on the 12th rolling it into the water for a double bogey.
At the same time someone nearly kills the gallery with an approach onto 11, and nobody even turns their head to look.
Leaderboard watching is now a common pastime, and the anticipation as the hand operated scoreboards are updated is exciting, this time the crowd roars as Cabrera bogeys
All over the course are club officials who also wear green jackets. Nevermind that it’s 70 degrees, and they’re clearly wearing them to show the world they’re important. I briefly ponder whether I could accost one, steal his jacket and make it out of there.
After wondering how the cops will react, I decide that given the medieval ways Georgia cops enforce traffic laws, stealing an green jacket is likely a death penalty offense here.
After 12 holes I decide golf is far more suited for television. The interminable length with which people take to line up putts is annoying enough, but Tiger just stared at the pin on 12 as if he could telepathically move it if he stared hard enough.
The fact all that dogwood didn't make me sneeze once during a putting sequence is a minor miracle.
The Mickelson brigade has hit the skids following the double bogey, but Tiger is making a push. From my vantage point on 14 I find myself standing next to his old swing coach, the legendary Butch Harmon.
He can barely watch as Tiger drills an approach, and again he looks away as his former pupil just misses a putt.
After both finish 14, someone near me asks “is anyone following the leaders?”
Harmon quickly provides the line of the day as he deadpanned “only their wives.”
I can’t help but wonder if Perry is playing so mistake free because there’s no pressure on him, since virtually everyone is following Phil and Tiger. Soon thereafter I had my answer.
Both Phil and Tiger miss golden eagle opportunities on 15 and Tiger’s birdie on 16 leaves them both one back heading to the final two holes. My adrenaline is racing as people hustle to get a good view of 17. It’s here I discover that running is not allowed at Augusta National. (insert standard Lee Corso “not so fast my friend” joke here _______).
The security guards who bark out "walk please" look like every retired lunchlady hall monitor I ever encountered in junior high. Only at Augusta can senior citizen women be adequate security.
I swear to God I wasn’t the guy who ran onto the course and did a snow angle in the bunker on 17. I did however have to explain to two southerners what a Snow Angel was, and invoking the name of Lonnie Paxton only complicated matters.
Tiger played 18 this week like Roy McAvoy in the movie Tin Cup, the only thing missing today was him asking his Kiwi Caddy (who has a hilarious accent, of which I don’t understand how Tiger can focus when he talks) for another ball. He capped this real life cinematic nightmare by hitting a tree. When the ball made contact with that tree it made a crack I’ve only heard when Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz take batting practice.
It’s apparently contagious as Mickelson finds the bunker on 18. Perhaps his caddy should tell him they play 19 holes on the final day of Major Championships from here on out.
For 16 holes this was an incredible event to watch unfold. Both guys seemed to try to one up each other and made the other step his game up, and usually they did. It was anything you can do I can do better.
Then the final two holes, they played a version of anything you can I can do crappier.
I am dead tired and decide to head toward the exit and beat some traffic. But the fact that I hadn’t actually seen the leader take a shot made me turn around and walk to 17. I can hear the roar of what was Perry’s incredible tee shot on 16, as the scores change I assume its over, but I arrive to 17 in time to see Kenny Perry bogey, as Cabrera saves a par.
Perry bogeys 18 and it’s on to a three way playoff. As the players make their way back up 18 the politeness of earlier has gone completely out the window as the rich folks who have seats in front of the green refuse to sit down sparking a large shouting match, that us plebeians eventually won out.
The views of the playoff I had were great, at least until Perry’s approach on the second playoff sailed deep into the woods. I was pulling for Perry once Phil and Tiger faded but to get to see great golf was a privilege.
I take issue with Masters fans being the best in golf as some have said, as I was floored to the parking lot more than half empty after the playoff was over.
Championship golf is definitely best suited for television and perhaps that's where many fans went to see the final stages unfold, but I’d encourage anyone to go spend a day at Augusta and experience the roar of the crowd as a huge putt goes down, and the cataclysmic groan as a shot falls just short.
It truly is a tradition and a sporting event unlike any other I have attended.
Instead we’re Taking a Mulligan…..reporting live from Augusta National…because quite frankly I needed a break from Jim Nantz and I wasn’t going to give up The Masters to make it happen…
Being stuck in rural Georgia for the last few months has been a tough life adjustment, but from the moment I accepted my new job, I had secretly hoped I could go see the Masters.
The schedule broke right for me, and the usually exorbitant prices started heading south this week, so the only thing standing in my way were studying for grad school exams I have this week.
I’ve never been the most judicious of students, so of course I chose to roll the dice and take a trip to Augusta.
I left the house at 7:30 and cruised in just under three hours. When you get off the highway I expected a pristine country club setting kind of road, like we have at Brookline.
Instead I found route 1 equivalent complete with a Waffle House and a Hooters. After making a right at the TGI Fridays, I pull onto this quiet tree lined lane with a couple houses and vast gravel parking lots.
Despite the fact the Members of Augusta National are generally rich Captains of Industry, I have to admire their disregard for Capitalism as they offer free parking for everyone.
I get out of my car and look for tickets, a half a mile back towards the highway later I procure one at a reasonable price (i.e. I’m able to keep my first born, and both legs), and now I’m headed back to the course.
Walking in the first thing that strikes you is how peaceful it is, almost no sound except for a few lone birds chirping, almost politely. The trees are towering high, and full of growth, something a hardended New Englander is not used to seeing in early April.
As the temperature warms, I am left with a tough decision about what to do with my long sleeve shirt. As I look around at some of the questionable fashion choices, I determine that I can in fact tie it around my waist, and not look like the biggest snob here.
The British guy in the bright purple and yellow Payne Stewart outfit I cam across later clearly had that honor.
I peruse the pro shop, where I too could own a goofy looking golf hat for a mere $50, or an $80 collared shirt. On the flip side the concession stand again seems to defy Capitalist values, as sandwiches go for a buck and a half, and soda and candy are a dollar. Beers are under three bucks, but I question the point of getting drunk at a golf tournament unless your buddies have raised enough bail money.
Cell phones and cameras aren’t allowed on the premises for obvious reasons, but they treat it like bringing a loaded gun into the club.
If you do need to make a phone call there is a bank of phones in random places that offer free long distance anywhere in the country. Sadly the advent of cell phones has rendered me unable to remember anyone’s number.
After walking through concessions and the pro shop, I see the course itself. It’s kind of like walking through all those shops at Disneyworld. The Magic Kingdom is off in the distance, in this case the leaderboard, and as soon as you get out into the clearing its sort of overwhelming which way to go because people are walking everywhere.
I choose to wander aimlessly and look at some holes as people who have no hope of winning are playing out the string. The first thing that strikes me is that golfers aren’t all that big, I know that’s not shocking news, but even folks who are supposed to be big like Cabrera aren’t.
As I survey the course, the color of green is striking, nothing faded (even the gravel cart path is dyed green) and the grass looks perfect (though trampled after seven days of public access). The azaleas are blooming, and the sand traps are whiter than any Caribbean Beach.
As I see some guys tee off and shoot irons, I’m struck by the fact the sound off the club is not the booming blast it sounds on tv, it’s a simple sound any average guy who hits the ball square can make. However as it whizzes by your head it’s a little unnerving, even though you know its not hitting you.
I head over to the 10th hole and watch a couple groups including Bubba Watson, who is clad in a teal shirt and plaid pants, while sporting a driver that has a hot pink shaft. I have no joke here, I think it speaks for itself.
D.J. Trahan (didn’t know who he was before today either) has a caddy who was sporting a Green Monster sox shirt under the painters coveralls caddies wear. Now one would think this would make him a reasonably friendly or affable man at least to a fellow Sox fan, one would be wrong.
The prevalence of Sox hats throughout the golf course was incredible. I think only Georgia hats were more common (aside from Masters and golf company hats) and not by much. I saw Sox hats of all types, including a Titleist hat with a Sox logo, truly a nation we have on our hands perhaps we can talk to Jerry Remy about a possible secession.
Viva La Revolucion!!!!
I briefly watch Tiger on the practice green. He drills five quick short putts, which only frustrates me more about my short game. However, those are the last five good putts he hits all day.
Had I been made aware of the amount of attractive women who inhabit golf tournaments, I might have applied myself earlier in life. At the very least I think these are things parents should be doing, that’s why Earl Woods superglued clubs to Tiger’s hands. He saw a future Swedish model daughter in law, fame and fortune were secondary. Further proof I was shortchanged growing up.
I choose to follow the group of Tiger and Phil Mickelson, and if they fall out of contention I’ll veer back and check out the final group. But also because nobody pays the big bucks to see Kenny Perry or Angel Cabrera do anything
Tiger opens his round in much the same way I probably would have, by carrying it over the gallery somewhere. Unlike me his second shot carries a tree and lands near the pin to save par.
My first sight of Phil Mickelson, all I could think of as the line in Tommy Boy, “the camera adds a couple of…hundred pounds.”
He’s not all that big, and certainly not pudgy at least not in person. However the pinstriped pants have him looking like a goofy European.
I’m not a fashion cop by any means, but between the fans and golfers, who thinks some of these look good? I saw a guy with gold sneakers, and a magenta collared shirt (collar up), really I demand an investigation.
Mickelson starts a birdie barrage on two, three, five and six and is walking like he knows he’s in a zone.
His par three tee shot on six that sailed over my head and onto the green next to the pin was amazing to see. The crowd is now cheering everything Phil does, including successfully walking from shot to shot.
He’s at seven under and making a real charge, I’m morally obligated to root for any lefty golfer, and this group has gotten interesting and into contention.
In the least improper golf attire for a fan contest, the tattooed white guy in the KG Celtics jersey seems a little out of place, a close second is the bandwagon fan in the Rays jersey.
That strut of Phil’s stopped briefly when he Winged Foot (yes it’s a verb meaning to find the woods with your drive in a major championship while in contention, hey my blog, my rules of grammar). However he hits an incredible iron that drops within two feet of the pin in front of me.
The fact I recognize Jim Furyk by sight from 75 yards away, just proves I watch too much Sportscenter.
Tiger is struggling and jokes are flying in the gallery as Phil has upstaged him, and is smiling ear to ear. I can’t help but wonder when the collapse will come. Tiger flips his putter in frustration after missing a putt on seven. I don’t know by how much because once the pin is gone, I can’t ever find the hole.
Through seven holes, I have yet to perfect the somber golf clap, which is sort of the obligatory applaud after making an easy tap in after failing to make the important putt. Veteran golf fans seem project a monotone boom after a disappointing hole.
I have however perfected the boisterous shriek after Mickelson does something well. His following is getting a little Happy Gilmore-esque.
I elect to get a drink and not follow the duo to eight, like Ron Burgundy I regret this immediately as I see Tiger nail a long eagle putt from the ninth green roughly 700 yards away kinda like being in the opposite endzone at Gillette.
Mickelson again Winged Foots a tee shot seeming a little rattled after Tiger’s eagle. He follows that by finding the bunker from the woods, however he saves par.
While I applaud excellent play, I have to say I enjoy the sufferings of professional golfers and in particular I love seeing a shot that rolls all the way down a steep slope, or a putt that rolls all the way off the green. I get to see Heidi Watney’s anorexic gangly cousin Watney putt one off the ninth, and Mickelson come up short on an approach. I’m sadistic I know, but I feel as though others should feel my pain sometime.
I jump all the way to Amen Corner which is an absolute mob scene, albeit the most polite mob on earth, as everyone says excuse me and genuinely cares about other’s sightlines (this will change later)
Despite the oversized gallery nobody is watching Watney or Stephen Ames play the par 3 12th.
The sightlines at 11 and 12 are among the best in all of the golf world, absolutely the perfect place to play golf. I’m simply not a good enough writer to adequately describe it.
Mickelson has now added a new shot to future Major blog verbiage, as he Augusta’s his tee shot on the 12th rolling it into the water for a double bogey.
At the same time someone nearly kills the gallery with an approach onto 11, and nobody even turns their head to look.
Leaderboard watching is now a common pastime, and the anticipation as the hand operated scoreboards are updated is exciting, this time the crowd roars as Cabrera bogeys
All over the course are club officials who also wear green jackets. Nevermind that it’s 70 degrees, and they’re clearly wearing them to show the world they’re important. I briefly ponder whether I could accost one, steal his jacket and make it out of there.
After wondering how the cops will react, I decide that given the medieval ways Georgia cops enforce traffic laws, stealing an green jacket is likely a death penalty offense here.
After 12 holes I decide golf is far more suited for television. The interminable length with which people take to line up putts is annoying enough, but Tiger just stared at the pin on 12 as if he could telepathically move it if he stared hard enough.
The fact all that dogwood didn't make me sneeze once during a putting sequence is a minor miracle.
The Mickelson brigade has hit the skids following the double bogey, but Tiger is making a push. From my vantage point on 14 I find myself standing next to his old swing coach, the legendary Butch Harmon.
He can barely watch as Tiger drills an approach, and again he looks away as his former pupil just misses a putt.
After both finish 14, someone near me asks “is anyone following the leaders?”
Harmon quickly provides the line of the day as he deadpanned “only their wives.”
I can’t help but wonder if Perry is playing so mistake free because there’s no pressure on him, since virtually everyone is following Phil and Tiger. Soon thereafter I had my answer.
Both Phil and Tiger miss golden eagle opportunities on 15 and Tiger’s birdie on 16 leaves them both one back heading to the final two holes. My adrenaline is racing as people hustle to get a good view of 17. It’s here I discover that running is not allowed at Augusta National. (insert standard Lee Corso “not so fast my friend” joke here _______).
The security guards who bark out "walk please" look like every retired lunchlady hall monitor I ever encountered in junior high. Only at Augusta can senior citizen women be adequate security.
I swear to God I wasn’t the guy who ran onto the course and did a snow angle in the bunker on 17. I did however have to explain to two southerners what a Snow Angel was, and invoking the name of Lonnie Paxton only complicated matters.
Tiger played 18 this week like Roy McAvoy in the movie Tin Cup, the only thing missing today was him asking his Kiwi Caddy (who has a hilarious accent, of which I don’t understand how Tiger can focus when he talks) for another ball. He capped this real life cinematic nightmare by hitting a tree. When the ball made contact with that tree it made a crack I’ve only heard when Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz take batting practice.
It’s apparently contagious as Mickelson finds the bunker on 18. Perhaps his caddy should tell him they play 19 holes on the final day of Major Championships from here on out.
For 16 holes this was an incredible event to watch unfold. Both guys seemed to try to one up each other and made the other step his game up, and usually they did. It was anything you can do I can do better.
Then the final two holes, they played a version of anything you can I can do crappier.
I am dead tired and decide to head toward the exit and beat some traffic. But the fact that I hadn’t actually seen the leader take a shot made me turn around and walk to 17. I can hear the roar of what was Perry’s incredible tee shot on 16, as the scores change I assume its over, but I arrive to 17 in time to see Kenny Perry bogey, as Cabrera saves a par.
Perry bogeys 18 and it’s on to a three way playoff. As the players make their way back up 18 the politeness of earlier has gone completely out the window as the rich folks who have seats in front of the green refuse to sit down sparking a large shouting match, that us plebeians eventually won out.
The views of the playoff I had were great, at least until Perry’s approach on the second playoff sailed deep into the woods. I was pulling for Perry once Phil and Tiger faded but to get to see great golf was a privilege.
I take issue with Masters fans being the best in golf as some have said, as I was floored to the parking lot more than half empty after the playoff was over.
Championship golf is definitely best suited for television and perhaps that's where many fans went to see the final stages unfold, but I’d encourage anyone to go spend a day at Augusta and experience the roar of the crowd as a huge putt goes down, and the cataclysmic groan as a shot falls just short.
It truly is a tradition and a sporting event unlike any other I have attended.
Thursday, April 09, 2009
Tossing Batting Practice….while wondering if there are any other words to the One Shining Moment song besides "One shining Moment"
All in all the tournament sucked from start to finish, and I’m not saying this cause I’m bitter I didn’t win a pool for the second year in a row. (the longest such streak in my life, I too may have to fire Billy Gillespie, and hire someone new to fill out my brackets).
The actual final CBS montage should have been a perpetual loop of Scottie Reynolds going the length of the floor to beat Pitt, since thats the only thing anyone will remember about this tournament.
The title game was so thoroughly uninteresting I was watching reruns of Family Guy and My Name is Earl by the time it was 14-7.
Saturday night I had the odd experience of walking into what turned out to be a Michigan St. bar for the semifinal game, and being the only UConn fan in the bar. I was happy for the Spartans but the 20 straight minutes I was subjected to the school song in the bar quickly proved to be annoying.
I have always hated North Carolina, I guess because I’ve been a Duke fan for a long time, but its also because I think Roy Williams’ whole folksy, dag gum it routine is a sham. I’m sure he really does act that way but to be honest, I like Jim Calhoun for all the reasons people don’t like him. He’s rude, and ornery, and quite frankly, he’s real. I feel Roy is a fake.
I was hoping that Villanova could pull off the upset Saturday, and get some revenge from the 2005 Sweet 16 in which they were robbed. With under 10 seconds to go Allan Ray drove to the bucket was fouled and hit a shot, only the whistle was blown for a phantom travel.
Only two people in the entire arena thought he traveled, the official, and Jason Harrington; bad officiating defender extraordinaire. Despite his presence as an oxymoronic (emphasis on the moronic) Millitary Intelligence officer, Jay would vehemently defend Osama Bin Laden against a bad call, if Osama were a fellow basketball official.
Jay and I along with Guiney were privileged to be in the Carrier Dome that night. Sort of. We were so far away it was hard to tell dark blue from sky blue, but regardless. UNC went on to win the national title, but I still say I was robbed from seeing one of the great upsets in tourney history that night.
Alas, Saturday night Villanova was just another in a long line of overmatched teams in this tournament, against UNC.
Despite my disdain for the Tar Heels I did enjoy watching them play this year, their fast break was impressive, and honestly, when they wanted to play defense they were as good as anybody in the country. Yes I am a huge basketball nerd.
It’s not often you can witness the peak of a person’s life come to an end, but when the scoreboard hit triple zeroes, the real world came calling for Tyler Hansbrough who will never be able to replicate his popularity for the last four years.
Hey Tim Tebow, hope you were watching, cause you’ll be experiencing the same thing next January.
I have long been a defender of the Globe, and while I won’t get into the whole issue about its potential demise, its stories like the one about the Vermont athletic director, who as the headline states “fosters a state of excellence” that makes the average person realize they too could be a sports writer or editor with seemingly no training.
For those of you who don’t know, UVM dropped a pair of spring sports earlier this year. It’s sad that it happened, but to laud an AD who is lucky enough to have a hockey program in the Frozen Four, as fostering excellence is kind of like George Bush proclaiming economic growth as unemployment skyrockets.
Monday was opening day, kind of. But even in Georgia it felt like the start of baseball season was here, after all it was cloudy and overcast, 43 degrees with a stiff wind that cut right through you. It felt like home.
Wednesday night I finally got to catch a Sox game, courtesy of the free baseball package preview, I can honestly say I was a little too excited to see a WB Mason commercial for the first time in three months. And there was something homely about the sound of Don and Jerry. Since I was priced out of Fenway long ago, the sights and sounds of the ballpark no longer indicate Opening Day, its commercials and Heidi Watney that tell me its spring time again.
So in game 2 of 162 I got a taunting text message about the Sox losing from a couple of Braves fans down here. I have to admire their incredibly poor timing and the faithfulness as many are convinced they can make a run this year if their young bullpen comes through. Well that young bullpen today blew a seven run lead in the seventh while walking in four runs with the bases loaded.
Might want to work on that timing Braves fans because your insults only make me laugh.
I am desperately trying to find a ticket to go to the Masters this weekend but since I might have to sell my first born it probably won’t happen, but instead I could attend the state Grits festival on Saturday, which I was informed three separate times in the 10 minutes I listened to the radio today.
All in all the tournament sucked from start to finish, and I’m not saying this cause I’m bitter I didn’t win a pool for the second year in a row. (the longest such streak in my life, I too may have to fire Billy Gillespie, and hire someone new to fill out my brackets).
The actual final CBS montage should have been a perpetual loop of Scottie Reynolds going the length of the floor to beat Pitt, since thats the only thing anyone will remember about this tournament.
The title game was so thoroughly uninteresting I was watching reruns of Family Guy and My Name is Earl by the time it was 14-7.
Saturday night I had the odd experience of walking into what turned out to be a Michigan St. bar for the semifinal game, and being the only UConn fan in the bar. I was happy for the Spartans but the 20 straight minutes I was subjected to the school song in the bar quickly proved to be annoying.
I have always hated North Carolina, I guess because I’ve been a Duke fan for a long time, but its also because I think Roy Williams’ whole folksy, dag gum it routine is a sham. I’m sure he really does act that way but to be honest, I like Jim Calhoun for all the reasons people don’t like him. He’s rude, and ornery, and quite frankly, he’s real. I feel Roy is a fake.
I was hoping that Villanova could pull off the upset Saturday, and get some revenge from the 2005 Sweet 16 in which they were robbed. With under 10 seconds to go Allan Ray drove to the bucket was fouled and hit a shot, only the whistle was blown for a phantom travel.
Only two people in the entire arena thought he traveled, the official, and Jason Harrington; bad officiating defender extraordinaire. Despite his presence as an oxymoronic (emphasis on the moronic) Millitary Intelligence officer, Jay would vehemently defend Osama Bin Laden against a bad call, if Osama were a fellow basketball official.
Jay and I along with Guiney were privileged to be in the Carrier Dome that night. Sort of. We were so far away it was hard to tell dark blue from sky blue, but regardless. UNC went on to win the national title, but I still say I was robbed from seeing one of the great upsets in tourney history that night.
Alas, Saturday night Villanova was just another in a long line of overmatched teams in this tournament, against UNC.
Despite my disdain for the Tar Heels I did enjoy watching them play this year, their fast break was impressive, and honestly, when they wanted to play defense they were as good as anybody in the country. Yes I am a huge basketball nerd.
It’s not often you can witness the peak of a person’s life come to an end, but when the scoreboard hit triple zeroes, the real world came calling for Tyler Hansbrough who will never be able to replicate his popularity for the last four years.
Hey Tim Tebow, hope you were watching, cause you’ll be experiencing the same thing next January.
I have long been a defender of the Globe, and while I won’t get into the whole issue about its potential demise, its stories like the one about the Vermont athletic director, who as the headline states “fosters a state of excellence” that makes the average person realize they too could be a sports writer or editor with seemingly no training.
For those of you who don’t know, UVM dropped a pair of spring sports earlier this year. It’s sad that it happened, but to laud an AD who is lucky enough to have a hockey program in the Frozen Four, as fostering excellence is kind of like George Bush proclaiming economic growth as unemployment skyrockets.
Monday was opening day, kind of. But even in Georgia it felt like the start of baseball season was here, after all it was cloudy and overcast, 43 degrees with a stiff wind that cut right through you. It felt like home.
Wednesday night I finally got to catch a Sox game, courtesy of the free baseball package preview, I can honestly say I was a little too excited to see a WB Mason commercial for the first time in three months. And there was something homely about the sound of Don and Jerry. Since I was priced out of Fenway long ago, the sights and sounds of the ballpark no longer indicate Opening Day, its commercials and Heidi Watney that tell me its spring time again.
So in game 2 of 162 I got a taunting text message about the Sox losing from a couple of Braves fans down here. I have to admire their incredibly poor timing and the faithfulness as many are convinced they can make a run this year if their young bullpen comes through. Well that young bullpen today blew a seven run lead in the seventh while walking in four runs with the bases loaded.
Might want to work on that timing Braves fans because your insults only make me laugh.
I am desperately trying to find a ticket to go to the Masters this weekend but since I might have to sell my first born it probably won’t happen, but instead I could attend the state Grits festival on Saturday, which I was informed three separate times in the 10 minutes I listened to the radio today.
Saturday, April 04, 2009
Tossing Batting Practice….like a demoted middle reliever wearing number 79 now plying my trade in a remote outpost like…well Rural Northeast Georgia…
It’s the baseball preview edition here, live from Deliverance. The college hoops regionals were thoroughly uninteresting, and we’ve kind of hit a brief lull in sports, thus the reason why it’s late Friday night and I am eagerly awaiting baseball season to start, so I can sit on my couch and watch games until 2am on a nightly basis.
I am going to attempt to successfully, and snidely preview each and every team briefly, while predicting their order of finish. The over/under on words is 3000.
We’ll start with the junior varsity, I mean the National League.
NL EAST Champion - NY Mets (the rest are in order of finish)
NY Mets – Honestly it wasn’t until the addition of Gary Sheffield did I feel confident of this pick, but let’s be honest, a volatile me-first over the hill aging superstar, adding to a team that has self destructed two years in a row under the weight of their own selfishness and fan expectations…I think this is a match made in heaven.
Biggest Question – Is David Wright fluent in Spanish?
PHILADELPHIA – I am not ready to live in a world where the phrase “defending champion Philadelphia” is a common recurrence, but alas such is the case. I can’t name three Phillies starters, nor a single middle reliever and I’m pretty sure Brad Lidge won’t be perfect again. (that’s the kind of in depth analysis you get here)
Burning Question – What is the statute of limitations before Philly Fans venom comes out in full force?
ATLANTA – The good news, bars aren’t open on Sunday’s here in Bible country, bad news, they’re open til 4am otherwise. Good luck with Derek Lowe guys, really. They’re an odd mix of young potential stars, and decrepit former stars a pretty good everyday lineup but no pitching at all.
Burning Question – At what age are you too old to be referred to as Chipper?
FLORIDA – Hanley Ramirez is awesome, Ricky Nolasco is pretty damn good, but there are 23 other guys on the roster, of whom cannot be described as either awesome, or pretty damn good.
Burning Question – Who ever thought this franchise was a good idea? South Florida, humidity, and constant threat of rain, doesn’t really equate to the fan experience.
WASHINGTON – If they hadn’t just built a new stadium I’d start to think they were pulling a Major League here, and trying to lose on purpose, though the addition of Adam Dunn reeks of the Jack Parkman addition in Major League II.
Burning Question - Is it possible the Lerner family is more inept at running a franchise than MLB was?
NL Central Champion – Chicago Cubs
CHICAGO – The rest of this division sucks, but so does this whole league. The Cubs have good starting pitching, a solid bullpen and a pretty good lineup. The craziness factor is upped a little with Milton Bradley being added.
Burning Question – When did Cubs fans become so miserable? They are really starting to become the standard bearer of the fellowship of the miserable, especially as Boston and Philly have become champions in this decade.
(At this point I put three names in a hat and pulled them out to determine order)
MILAWUKEE – After mortgaging their future, and going all in to extend their season a week and earn the right to play 166 games the Brewers will come back to earth a bit this year. The fact Jeff Suppan is their staff “ace” has a lot to do with that.
Burning Question – Is there a more dangerous combination to long term health than the food in Milwaukee, and Prince Fielder’s metabolism and appetite?
CINCINATTI – They seem to be the popular sleeper pick, but only if they drug Dusty Baker into a permanent sleep and run the team themselves. The Red have immense young talent in the lineup, and corpse of Ken Griffey is no longer stinking up the Center Field area. Jay Bruce and Joey Votto are the great white hopes for a city that could really use some good. However, I cannot root for a team that gave America Joe Morgan, professional baseball announcer extraordinaire.
Burning Question – Alex Gonzalez is really going to bat second for these guys? After double checking to make sure it was the same one (I mean its kind of like the Spanish John Smith) it is one and the same. Third place seems right.
ST. LOUIS – Had they spent the money and added Manny Ramirez a division title would be in the Cards (those are the kind of poor puns that show I have professional sports writing experience) instead they’ve got Pujols, and a whole lot of ifs. Rick Ankiel is exciting, and they have a guy named Skip leading off.
Burning Question –Most would think its “who will be the closer” but personally I wonder if Chris Carpenter or Bob Tewksbury has had the better career with the Cardinals for a starting pitcher born in New Hampshire.
HOUSTON – They were god awful in spring training, and Roy Oswalt did a terrific job of landing himself on a potential homegrown terrorist watch list with the way he disrespected his country in his performance in the WBC. In Japan he would have been asked to kill himself honorably.
Burning question – Do Lance Berkman and Carlos Lee have to stand on opposite ends of the field so it doesn’t tilt? Those two would be a great tackle/tight end combo to run behind for the Texans.
PITTSBURGH – There is nothing redeeming about even researching this team, though my brief review I learned that pitcher Paul Maholm is not the same former Twins prospect (that was Pat Mahomes). Good news Craig Hansen won’t be able to piss off an entire fan base unless he takes Ben Roethlisberger for a motorcycle ride.
Burning Question – How many home games will have a smaller attendance than the first day of Steelers training camp in Latrobe?
NL WEST Champion – LA Dodgers
LOS ANGELES – I’m contractually obligated to pick the Dodgers, so says my boss. The Dodgers have the best lineup in the division, and the best bullpen, but they’ll need better starting pitching Pedro Martinez is a natural fit, but for some strange reason Frank McCourt is cheaping out, perhaps he forgot Petey is an Ex-Red Sox, which he seems to collect like living baseball cards. It even extends to the minors, where former Sox John Valentin and Danny Darwin are managers in the system.
Burning Question – Will I watch more Dodger or Red Sox games this year courtesy of the baseball package? The Sox are the safer bet, but the Dodgers are on at a more convenient late night time.
ARIZONA – They have the best starting pitching, and potentially the best lineup if Justin Upton and Stephen Drew have breakout years, but they don’t hit for average well, and may struggle to score runs without leaving the ballpark. Their bullpen is also a big question mark at the moment. Regardless this could be the best race of the summer.
Burning Question – How is Tony Clark still employed in the big leagues? He was D-U-N done in 2002, yet he’s managed to survive seven more years, who does he have incriminating photos of?
SAN FRANCISCO – They have the best 1-2 punch in the league in Cain and Lincecum, but how the Giants will score runs is a bigger question then how did Seal nab Heidi Klum. The first team to score twice, might be the winner each time the Giants play.
Pablo Sandoval seems like a jovial fat baby Ortiz type figure to root for. Upon further review projected third hitter Fred Lewis is not a former Boston Bruins coach, and the rest of the lineup is pretty unknown too.
Burning Question – Is there a starker contrast between any two lefties in baseball history than Randy Johnson and Barry Zito?
COLORADO – Clearly Jesus-loving Clint Hurdle and the rest of the Pious Rockies sold their souls to someone to make the 2007 World Series, and the sudden repentance the Lord has forced the Rox to pay is life in baseball purgatory, not as bad as the Padres, but not good enough to play .500 ball all summer and stay in the race.
Burning Question – Boy those Troy Tulowitzki/Derek Jeter comparisons stopped pretty fast huh?
SAN DIEGO – By default they’ll win 60 games and lose 60 games, but the other 60 that determine a season, well the Padres could lose 55 of them. They have a worse offense than the Giants, and play in the Grand Canyon, but their pitching is atrocious too, and I’m pretty sure Alphabetically you’ll find Jake Peavey right after Oswalt on that potential home grown terrorist watch list thanks to the WBC.
Burning Question – This team isn’t interesting enough to have a burning question, and too many holes to limit things to just one. Perhaps the larger question, why doesn't everyone live in San Diego fits here?
AMERICAN LEAGUE (aka the Varsity)
The AL East is down the bottom so you either have to read the whole thing, or be inconvenienced enough to have to scroll down to the end.
AL CENTRAL CHAMPION – Cleveland Indians
CLEVELAND – I feel like the Devil Rays should be moved to this division, just to add a team that doesn’t suck completely. But the Indians will win it by default. Cliff Lee will not repeat last year, but the rest of their rotation is decent enough given the lineup they’ll trot out every night.
Burning Question – Will Carl Pavano exceed the number of Yankee starts he made by A) Mother’s Day B) Memorial Day C) Labor Day?
DETROIT – This team will make a run only because it will screw ownership. They’re banking on a poor start and then a fire sale of Marlins proportions, but they have the pitching and a decent enough lineup to stay in the race but their bullpen sucks, and will ultimately be their undoing, sometime in August after the deadline, where they’ll still be on the hook for all those big guns they didn’t trade.
Burning Question – Given Joel Zumaya’s injury history with Guitar Hero, is there a team policy banning use of the Wii?
MINNESOTA – Joe Mauer is hurt again, and thus they’ll be a middle of the pack team. They have a great bullpen, but not enough starting pitching and a thin lineup.
Burning Question – Honestly I got nothing here, I even waited until the end in hopes of coming up with something, but hey 29 out of 30 isnt bad right?
CHICAGO – Sorry Guiney, but this team will underachieve. They are aging slow and one dimensional in the middle of the lineup, and young and inexperienced at the top and bottom. Their bullpen could be good with the addition of Linebrink, but their rotation has some question marks mainly the age of Jose Contreras, and the weight of Bartolo Colon.
Burning Question – If Ozzie Guillen tips over the postgame spread in a tirade, would Bartolo Colon resort to cannibalism?
KANSAS CITY – It seems fitting that Kyle Farnsworth was jettisoned to baseball Siberia, but I feel for Coco Crisp. The rest of the Royals roster is interesting (ok, only mildly), could be good, could be awful. Alex Gordon is supposed to be on the verge of a breakout season, and allegedly Zach Greinke is a star in the making. I read more about the Royals in the last five minutes, than in the last 5 years, so take it for what its worth.
Burning Question – Why do people even attend their games? It’s hot as hell there, it’s a crappy stadium, and a worse product.
AL WEST Champion- California and Surrounding counties and territories Angels
LOS ANGELES/ANAHEIM/ORANGE COUNTY/ SOUTH CENTRAL/LONG BEACH
I don’t want to be accused of leaving something out. Anyway, the Angels are the favorite here because everyone else has more questions. Abreu is the steal of the offseason at his pricetag, but Guerrero is looking and walking like Earl Campbell more and more every day. The rotation is in shambles right now due to injury, and the bullpen has a few questions as well. The addition of Fuentes helps, anchor with Arredondo who was impressive last October.
Burning Question – “Will I…be able…to play….softball…tomorrow???” “No by tomorrow you’ll barely be able to breathe.”
Aside from the miraculous recovery from acute radiation poisoning suffered during a guest spot on the Simpsons, why does Mike Scoisia get so much love? He’s short tempered, whiny, and growing more ornery by the day while not having won anything important in years. Food for thought that’s all.
OAKLAND – I love them to maybe win the division, but then I honestly questioned whether or not the other four projected starters after Duchscherer were made up names. Plus if they stumble early they’ll also be selling like the Marlins after a world title. The A’s have good young pitching, and apparently focus on defense more now, but the offense is still a question. The additions of Giambi and Holiday are a step in the right direction, but Holliday may be a system (Coors Field) guy, and Giambi wont have the short porch in right to lean on.
Burning Question – Will the number of smiles Nomar cracks be less than or equal to the number of at-bats he gets a week. (please show your work in determining this calculation)
TEXAS – They’re playing out the string already. Offensively they are solid, but not what they have been in the past. They still have a bad rotation and even crappier bullpen so I wouldn’t expect much beyond the usual 11-8 slugfest, though they’d probably win the NL Central or West going away.
Burning Question – As Jason Varitek’s batting average drops lower than his weight, and Clay Bucholz’s ERA at Pawtucket, drops lower than Heidi Watney’s weight, how many days a week will the names of Saltalamachia, and Teagarden appear in the Globe and Herald?
SEATTLE – King Felix Hernandez, and Erik Bedard will make this team interesting to watch for the first 105 pitches of games when the Mariners are in the field twice a week, otherwise, the Moose (which never seemed to make sense as a mascot to me) becomes the most exciting aspect about the Mariners. The calcification and decaying of the corpse of Ken Griffey (who ceases to be “junior” when he turns 35) in center field might be a fun way to waste a summer if you’re a Mariner season ticket holder in the bleachers.
Burning Question – Did Ichiro’s ulcer come from the stress of representing Japan in the WBC or the impending doom of having to go back to the Mariners and get his ass kicked all season?
AL EAST Champion – Satan
NY YANKEES – There is no way this team doesn’t win the division. Joe Girardi sees the national unemployment rate of 8.5% and knows he doesn’t want to be calling the department of workforce development any time soon. Thus, he’ll have the pedal to the metal all season long, likely making life miserable for this team come late August, and into September. But I think they still win the Division by taking the shortsighted view of feeling as though they have to do everything to win every game, as opposed to playing for October, they’ll be playing to get to October.
There are legitimate lineup questions, and defensive issues, as well as bullpen queries. But I think the rotation is built for the regular season, and they’ll plenty of runs.
Burning Question – How will this team take ARod back? Since he left they were basically camp tranquility and quietly won the most games in Florida. How he assimilates back to the ballclub will go a long way toward how far they go into October.
BOSTON – The Sox have a ton of pitching on paper, but question marks within that. How will Penny, and Smoltz hold up, what kind of Wakefield are we getting, can Bucholz be the dominant force he’s shown flashes of? The Bullpen might be as good as its been in my lifetime, but its always a crapshoot. I just don’t think there’s enough offense right now. If Ellsbury shows improvement and Varitek can hit his weight, and Drew plays 135 games, and Ortiz hits for some power, and Lowell returns to some form all bets are off. But that’s a lot of ifs. Pedroia and Youkilis are the only sure things so to speak in the lineup, but I want to see a little more out of them before I’m a total believer. (the sudden downfall of Nomar, and the vast overrating of hometowners Troy O’Leary, and John Valentin leave me skeptical, along with the inherent Red Sox fan trait to always expect the other shoe to drop)
They are in great position to acquire someone in a fire sale, but where will they play? Center Field and Shortstop are the only place and neither Hanley Ramirez or Grady Sizemore are walking through that door. Fortunately I am a ploythiestic worshipper and while that makes me a heathen down south, "In Theo and Tito I trust" to make the right decisions and put this team in position to win.
Burning question – I think we covered all 13 of them above, and this team was so bland during spring training I don’t even have anything witty to snark at. Ok, how bout this one; am I the only 2009 baseball preview in America that featured two separate references to John Valentin? I vote yes.
TAMPA BAY – The Rays lineup is probably the best in the Division, at least with ARod out, but there are legitimate questions about their pitching. The pitching staff can go one of two ways. They can continue to make the leap and become the 1990s Braves, in which case we’re all playing for second and a wild card berth. Or they can fall back to earth a bit, as the toll last season took rears its ugly head the following season as it is often wont to do (see, Foulke, Keith; Beckett, Josh; Indians, 2007). I think the latter is the more likely scenario. They will score a ton of runs, but they Rays don’t have the depth to fill pitching holes if injuries, fatigue and poor execution set in. In an age of pitch counts and innings maximums for young pitchers, the Rays pitchers exceeded all of them last season, and I think it’s a reasonable prospect to expect them to plateau a little. In any other division they could get over this and probably still run away and hide, but not in the AL East.
Burning Question – Now that he’s making good money and a well respected Manager, what exactly is stopping Joe Maddon from getting laser eye surgery, those glasses send off more of a Kennedy Administration Cabinet member circa the Cuban Missile Crisis, than it does AL Manager of the year.
TORONTO – Any former manager who calls Roger Clemens an As**ole is ok in my book, score one for Cito Gaston. However, that might be the only thing Cito and his boys score this season. Once again the Jays could be a contender anywhere else, but will lose 90 games in the revamped AL East. They have one solid starter, two solid hitters, and one solid closer. A good core, but not enough in this Division.
Burning Question – Not so much for the Jays but about them, whoever struggles with this team will be on the outside looking in come playoff time.
BALTIMORE – There is absolutely no redeeming quality about this team until they call up prized prospect Matt Wieters, who is some sort of catcher superhero by all accounts, but unless he can pitch, catch, and bat in all nine positions the O’s will still suck, they’ll just be intriguing to fantasy players who draft Wieters in a keeper league.
Burning Question – How many times will centerfielder Adam Jones be mistaken for miscreant pond scum unemployed punt returner Adam Jones?
And that’s my regular season predicted order of finish, I would love some comments about my baseball intellect (won’t hold my breath on that one) or idiocy, and your Division winners are also welcome.
Also if anyone is reading this is interest in putting together a fantasy baseball league shoot me an email (or a phone call if you have the bat phone number) and I’ll set something up.
It’s the baseball preview edition here, live from Deliverance. The college hoops regionals were thoroughly uninteresting, and we’ve kind of hit a brief lull in sports, thus the reason why it’s late Friday night and I am eagerly awaiting baseball season to start, so I can sit on my couch and watch games until 2am on a nightly basis.
I am going to attempt to successfully, and snidely preview each and every team briefly, while predicting their order of finish. The over/under on words is 3000.
We’ll start with the junior varsity, I mean the National League.
NL EAST Champion - NY Mets (the rest are in order of finish)
NY Mets – Honestly it wasn’t until the addition of Gary Sheffield did I feel confident of this pick, but let’s be honest, a volatile me-first over the hill aging superstar, adding to a team that has self destructed two years in a row under the weight of their own selfishness and fan expectations…I think this is a match made in heaven.
Biggest Question – Is David Wright fluent in Spanish?
PHILADELPHIA – I am not ready to live in a world where the phrase “defending champion Philadelphia” is a common recurrence, but alas such is the case. I can’t name three Phillies starters, nor a single middle reliever and I’m pretty sure Brad Lidge won’t be perfect again. (that’s the kind of in depth analysis you get here)
Burning Question – What is the statute of limitations before Philly Fans venom comes out in full force?
ATLANTA – The good news, bars aren’t open on Sunday’s here in Bible country, bad news, they’re open til 4am otherwise. Good luck with Derek Lowe guys, really. They’re an odd mix of young potential stars, and decrepit former stars a pretty good everyday lineup but no pitching at all.
Burning Question – At what age are you too old to be referred to as Chipper?
FLORIDA – Hanley Ramirez is awesome, Ricky Nolasco is pretty damn good, but there are 23 other guys on the roster, of whom cannot be described as either awesome, or pretty damn good.
Burning Question – Who ever thought this franchise was a good idea? South Florida, humidity, and constant threat of rain, doesn’t really equate to the fan experience.
WASHINGTON – If they hadn’t just built a new stadium I’d start to think they were pulling a Major League here, and trying to lose on purpose, though the addition of Adam Dunn reeks of the Jack Parkman addition in Major League II.
Burning Question - Is it possible the Lerner family is more inept at running a franchise than MLB was?
NL Central Champion – Chicago Cubs
CHICAGO – The rest of this division sucks, but so does this whole league. The Cubs have good starting pitching, a solid bullpen and a pretty good lineup. The craziness factor is upped a little with Milton Bradley being added.
Burning Question – When did Cubs fans become so miserable? They are really starting to become the standard bearer of the fellowship of the miserable, especially as Boston and Philly have become champions in this decade.
(At this point I put three names in a hat and pulled them out to determine order)
MILAWUKEE – After mortgaging their future, and going all in to extend their season a week and earn the right to play 166 games the Brewers will come back to earth a bit this year. The fact Jeff Suppan is their staff “ace” has a lot to do with that.
Burning Question – Is there a more dangerous combination to long term health than the food in Milwaukee, and Prince Fielder’s metabolism and appetite?
CINCINATTI – They seem to be the popular sleeper pick, but only if they drug Dusty Baker into a permanent sleep and run the team themselves. The Red have immense young talent in the lineup, and corpse of Ken Griffey is no longer stinking up the Center Field area. Jay Bruce and Joey Votto are the great white hopes for a city that could really use some good. However, I cannot root for a team that gave America Joe Morgan, professional baseball announcer extraordinaire.
Burning Question – Alex Gonzalez is really going to bat second for these guys? After double checking to make sure it was the same one (I mean its kind of like the Spanish John Smith) it is one and the same. Third place seems right.
ST. LOUIS – Had they spent the money and added Manny Ramirez a division title would be in the Cards (those are the kind of poor puns that show I have professional sports writing experience) instead they’ve got Pujols, and a whole lot of ifs. Rick Ankiel is exciting, and they have a guy named Skip leading off.
Burning Question –Most would think its “who will be the closer” but personally I wonder if Chris Carpenter or Bob Tewksbury has had the better career with the Cardinals for a starting pitcher born in New Hampshire.
HOUSTON – They were god awful in spring training, and Roy Oswalt did a terrific job of landing himself on a potential homegrown terrorist watch list with the way he disrespected his country in his performance in the WBC. In Japan he would have been asked to kill himself honorably.
Burning question – Do Lance Berkman and Carlos Lee have to stand on opposite ends of the field so it doesn’t tilt? Those two would be a great tackle/tight end combo to run behind for the Texans.
PITTSBURGH – There is nothing redeeming about even researching this team, though my brief review I learned that pitcher Paul Maholm is not the same former Twins prospect (that was Pat Mahomes). Good news Craig Hansen won’t be able to piss off an entire fan base unless he takes Ben Roethlisberger for a motorcycle ride.
Burning Question – How many home games will have a smaller attendance than the first day of Steelers training camp in Latrobe?
NL WEST Champion – LA Dodgers
LOS ANGELES – I’m contractually obligated to pick the Dodgers, so says my boss. The Dodgers have the best lineup in the division, and the best bullpen, but they’ll need better starting pitching Pedro Martinez is a natural fit, but for some strange reason Frank McCourt is cheaping out, perhaps he forgot Petey is an Ex-Red Sox, which he seems to collect like living baseball cards. It even extends to the minors, where former Sox John Valentin and Danny Darwin are managers in the system.
Burning Question – Will I watch more Dodger or Red Sox games this year courtesy of the baseball package? The Sox are the safer bet, but the Dodgers are on at a more convenient late night time.
ARIZONA – They have the best starting pitching, and potentially the best lineup if Justin Upton and Stephen Drew have breakout years, but they don’t hit for average well, and may struggle to score runs without leaving the ballpark. Their bullpen is also a big question mark at the moment. Regardless this could be the best race of the summer.
Burning Question – How is Tony Clark still employed in the big leagues? He was D-U-N done in 2002, yet he’s managed to survive seven more years, who does he have incriminating photos of?
SAN FRANCISCO – They have the best 1-2 punch in the league in Cain and Lincecum, but how the Giants will score runs is a bigger question then how did Seal nab Heidi Klum. The first team to score twice, might be the winner each time the Giants play.
Pablo Sandoval seems like a jovial fat baby Ortiz type figure to root for. Upon further review projected third hitter Fred Lewis is not a former Boston Bruins coach, and the rest of the lineup is pretty unknown too.
Burning Question – Is there a starker contrast between any two lefties in baseball history than Randy Johnson and Barry Zito?
COLORADO – Clearly Jesus-loving Clint Hurdle and the rest of the Pious Rockies sold their souls to someone to make the 2007 World Series, and the sudden repentance the Lord has forced the Rox to pay is life in baseball purgatory, not as bad as the Padres, but not good enough to play .500 ball all summer and stay in the race.
Burning Question – Boy those Troy Tulowitzki/Derek Jeter comparisons stopped pretty fast huh?
SAN DIEGO – By default they’ll win 60 games and lose 60 games, but the other 60 that determine a season, well the Padres could lose 55 of them. They have a worse offense than the Giants, and play in the Grand Canyon, but their pitching is atrocious too, and I’m pretty sure Alphabetically you’ll find Jake Peavey right after Oswalt on that potential home grown terrorist watch list thanks to the WBC.
Burning Question – This team isn’t interesting enough to have a burning question, and too many holes to limit things to just one. Perhaps the larger question, why doesn't everyone live in San Diego fits here?
AMERICAN LEAGUE (aka the Varsity)
The AL East is down the bottom so you either have to read the whole thing, or be inconvenienced enough to have to scroll down to the end.
AL CENTRAL CHAMPION – Cleveland Indians
CLEVELAND – I feel like the Devil Rays should be moved to this division, just to add a team that doesn’t suck completely. But the Indians will win it by default. Cliff Lee will not repeat last year, but the rest of their rotation is decent enough given the lineup they’ll trot out every night.
Burning Question – Will Carl Pavano exceed the number of Yankee starts he made by A) Mother’s Day B) Memorial Day C) Labor Day?
DETROIT – This team will make a run only because it will screw ownership. They’re banking on a poor start and then a fire sale of Marlins proportions, but they have the pitching and a decent enough lineup to stay in the race but their bullpen sucks, and will ultimately be their undoing, sometime in August after the deadline, where they’ll still be on the hook for all those big guns they didn’t trade.
Burning Question – Given Joel Zumaya’s injury history with Guitar Hero, is there a team policy banning use of the Wii?
MINNESOTA – Joe Mauer is hurt again, and thus they’ll be a middle of the pack team. They have a great bullpen, but not enough starting pitching and a thin lineup.
Burning Question – Honestly I got nothing here, I even waited until the end in hopes of coming up with something, but hey 29 out of 30 isnt bad right?
CHICAGO – Sorry Guiney, but this team will underachieve. They are aging slow and one dimensional in the middle of the lineup, and young and inexperienced at the top and bottom. Their bullpen could be good with the addition of Linebrink, but their rotation has some question marks mainly the age of Jose Contreras, and the weight of Bartolo Colon.
Burning Question – If Ozzie Guillen tips over the postgame spread in a tirade, would Bartolo Colon resort to cannibalism?
KANSAS CITY – It seems fitting that Kyle Farnsworth was jettisoned to baseball Siberia, but I feel for Coco Crisp. The rest of the Royals roster is interesting (ok, only mildly), could be good, could be awful. Alex Gordon is supposed to be on the verge of a breakout season, and allegedly Zach Greinke is a star in the making. I read more about the Royals in the last five minutes, than in the last 5 years, so take it for what its worth.
Burning Question – Why do people even attend their games? It’s hot as hell there, it’s a crappy stadium, and a worse product.
AL WEST Champion- California and Surrounding counties and territories Angels
LOS ANGELES/ANAHEIM/ORANGE COUNTY/ SOUTH CENTRAL/LONG BEACH
I don’t want to be accused of leaving something out. Anyway, the Angels are the favorite here because everyone else has more questions. Abreu is the steal of the offseason at his pricetag, but Guerrero is looking and walking like Earl Campbell more and more every day. The rotation is in shambles right now due to injury, and the bullpen has a few questions as well. The addition of Fuentes helps, anchor with Arredondo who was impressive last October.
Burning Question – “Will I…be able…to play….softball…tomorrow???” “No by tomorrow you’ll barely be able to breathe.”
Aside from the miraculous recovery from acute radiation poisoning suffered during a guest spot on the Simpsons, why does Mike Scoisia get so much love? He’s short tempered, whiny, and growing more ornery by the day while not having won anything important in years. Food for thought that’s all.
OAKLAND – I love them to maybe win the division, but then I honestly questioned whether or not the other four projected starters after Duchscherer were made up names. Plus if they stumble early they’ll also be selling like the Marlins after a world title. The A’s have good young pitching, and apparently focus on defense more now, but the offense is still a question. The additions of Giambi and Holiday are a step in the right direction, but Holliday may be a system (Coors Field) guy, and Giambi wont have the short porch in right to lean on.
Burning Question – Will the number of smiles Nomar cracks be less than or equal to the number of at-bats he gets a week. (please show your work in determining this calculation)
TEXAS – They’re playing out the string already. Offensively they are solid, but not what they have been in the past. They still have a bad rotation and even crappier bullpen so I wouldn’t expect much beyond the usual 11-8 slugfest, though they’d probably win the NL Central or West going away.
Burning Question – As Jason Varitek’s batting average drops lower than his weight, and Clay Bucholz’s ERA at Pawtucket, drops lower than Heidi Watney’s weight, how many days a week will the names of Saltalamachia, and Teagarden appear in the Globe and Herald?
SEATTLE – King Felix Hernandez, and Erik Bedard will make this team interesting to watch for the first 105 pitches of games when the Mariners are in the field twice a week, otherwise, the Moose (which never seemed to make sense as a mascot to me) becomes the most exciting aspect about the Mariners. The calcification and decaying of the corpse of Ken Griffey (who ceases to be “junior” when he turns 35) in center field might be a fun way to waste a summer if you’re a Mariner season ticket holder in the bleachers.
Burning Question – Did Ichiro’s ulcer come from the stress of representing Japan in the WBC or the impending doom of having to go back to the Mariners and get his ass kicked all season?
AL EAST Champion – Satan
NY YANKEES – There is no way this team doesn’t win the division. Joe Girardi sees the national unemployment rate of 8.5% and knows he doesn’t want to be calling the department of workforce development any time soon. Thus, he’ll have the pedal to the metal all season long, likely making life miserable for this team come late August, and into September. But I think they still win the Division by taking the shortsighted view of feeling as though they have to do everything to win every game, as opposed to playing for October, they’ll be playing to get to October.
There are legitimate lineup questions, and defensive issues, as well as bullpen queries. But I think the rotation is built for the regular season, and they’ll plenty of runs.
Burning Question – How will this team take ARod back? Since he left they were basically camp tranquility and quietly won the most games in Florida. How he assimilates back to the ballclub will go a long way toward how far they go into October.
BOSTON – The Sox have a ton of pitching on paper, but question marks within that. How will Penny, and Smoltz hold up, what kind of Wakefield are we getting, can Bucholz be the dominant force he’s shown flashes of? The Bullpen might be as good as its been in my lifetime, but its always a crapshoot. I just don’t think there’s enough offense right now. If Ellsbury shows improvement and Varitek can hit his weight, and Drew plays 135 games, and Ortiz hits for some power, and Lowell returns to some form all bets are off. But that’s a lot of ifs. Pedroia and Youkilis are the only sure things so to speak in the lineup, but I want to see a little more out of them before I’m a total believer. (the sudden downfall of Nomar, and the vast overrating of hometowners Troy O’Leary, and John Valentin leave me skeptical, along with the inherent Red Sox fan trait to always expect the other shoe to drop)
They are in great position to acquire someone in a fire sale, but where will they play? Center Field and Shortstop are the only place and neither Hanley Ramirez or Grady Sizemore are walking through that door. Fortunately I am a ploythiestic worshipper and while that makes me a heathen down south, "In Theo and Tito I trust" to make the right decisions and put this team in position to win.
Burning question – I think we covered all 13 of them above, and this team was so bland during spring training I don’t even have anything witty to snark at. Ok, how bout this one; am I the only 2009 baseball preview in America that featured two separate references to John Valentin? I vote yes.
TAMPA BAY – The Rays lineup is probably the best in the Division, at least with ARod out, but there are legitimate questions about their pitching. The pitching staff can go one of two ways. They can continue to make the leap and become the 1990s Braves, in which case we’re all playing for second and a wild card berth. Or they can fall back to earth a bit, as the toll last season took rears its ugly head the following season as it is often wont to do (see, Foulke, Keith; Beckett, Josh; Indians, 2007). I think the latter is the more likely scenario. They will score a ton of runs, but they Rays don’t have the depth to fill pitching holes if injuries, fatigue and poor execution set in. In an age of pitch counts and innings maximums for young pitchers, the Rays pitchers exceeded all of them last season, and I think it’s a reasonable prospect to expect them to plateau a little. In any other division they could get over this and probably still run away and hide, but not in the AL East.
Burning Question – Now that he’s making good money and a well respected Manager, what exactly is stopping Joe Maddon from getting laser eye surgery, those glasses send off more of a Kennedy Administration Cabinet member circa the Cuban Missile Crisis, than it does AL Manager of the year.
TORONTO – Any former manager who calls Roger Clemens an As**ole is ok in my book, score one for Cito Gaston. However, that might be the only thing Cito and his boys score this season. Once again the Jays could be a contender anywhere else, but will lose 90 games in the revamped AL East. They have one solid starter, two solid hitters, and one solid closer. A good core, but not enough in this Division.
Burning Question – Not so much for the Jays but about them, whoever struggles with this team will be on the outside looking in come playoff time.
BALTIMORE – There is absolutely no redeeming quality about this team until they call up prized prospect Matt Wieters, who is some sort of catcher superhero by all accounts, but unless he can pitch, catch, and bat in all nine positions the O’s will still suck, they’ll just be intriguing to fantasy players who draft Wieters in a keeper league.
Burning Question – How many times will centerfielder Adam Jones be mistaken for miscreant pond scum unemployed punt returner Adam Jones?
And that’s my regular season predicted order of finish, I would love some comments about my baseball intellect (won’t hold my breath on that one) or idiocy, and your Division winners are also welcome.
Also if anyone is reading this is interest in putting together a fantasy baseball league shoot me an email (or a phone call if you have the bat phone number) and I’ll set something up.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Tossing Batting Practice….while wondering how a country that produced the immortal Jin Ho Cho and Sun Wu Kim can be in the WBC final?
So much like the Little League World Series, the US lost to Japan (after all the Chinese Taipei guys were like 46) and our boys are going home. It’s good to see that Roy Oswalt, who got lit up in the final, will fit in well with the rest of the Astros, who are on track to make the ’03 Tigers look like the ’98 Yankees.
Had I still been in college while watching last night’s game, I think I would have enjoyed the Sadahara Oh drinking game. Basically if I took a drink every time the ESPN booth mentioned his name or the camera flashed to him, I would have had alcohol poisoning of epic proportions. Also known as the Jimmy Buffet edition.
(there I beat all of you who know me to the punch, so any comments will not get past the fictional ombudsman)
We get it, revered Japanese hero, they love him, hit lots of home runs. Alright enough already.
So Castro's son is apparently the trainer for Cuba? Does he also administer the beatings for potential defectors? Does he put players down like horses when they're too hurt to perform? I have lots of questions about this.
Is it like prison, do the Cuban hierarchy beat the hell out of one player to prevent mass defections? Or are there families held in a work commune together only to be released provided all players return?
Sticking with baseball momentarily, everyone knows Curt Schilling retired today, and it does start to mark the end of an era in my eyes.
The departure of Manny, and the instant aging of Varitek and Ortiz last year started the trend, but now the book is starting to close on the last team of my youth.
The group of idiots, and why not us, was the last team that featured all the players older than me, and was the last group I truly lived and died with every single day.
Schilling has been a polarizing figure here in new England the last couple years, but to me I love him. I don’t agree with his politics in the least, or many of his other opinions, but an athlete that candid about anything, and that thankful to be a ballplayer, and to the fans is ok in my book.
I still remember the chills I got as we cheered Schilling as he walked to the bullpen for the start of game 2 of the 04 World Series, for all you did Curt, I say thank you.
I tried today to explain the magnitude of what 2004 meant to me and everyone I know to a southerner today. The best equivalent I could come up with would be beating Florida in the BCS title game after trailing 28-0 after three quarters.
If you equate anything in life to college football…a southerner will understand you. I think that’s where Obama needs to go to garner support for his policies.
After driving to Myrtle Beach and back this week, I have to say, the state of South Carolina is a lot bigger than it looks on a map.
Myrtle Beach was nice, kinda looked like a cleaner Atlantic City, minus the drugs, hookers, Jersey trash and Casinos.
Which I guess makes it nothing like Atlantic City, oh well.
Most of my drunken ramblings about the NCAA tournament came and went, clearly I am more coherent and thoughtful sober, but I’m infinitely funnier drunk.
However, nothing sucks more than liking an upset and talking yourself out of it, only to see it come to fruition. I’m looking at you Cleveland St. And glancing with an evil eye at Wake Forest.
Overall it was kind of a dull first two rounds in my strictly for entertainment purposes bracket challenge against myself; I still have a pretty good shot to win, provided everything goes my way.
I was 13-16 in the Sweet 16, and frankly had I actually listened to some of my own research written below I might have been better. Instead I got drunk Wednesday night and put my picks in at 1am.
Like the good coach in me I'm more annoyed with the games I lost, particularly because they could have been prevented.
After spending the tournament in Vegas last year, I am forever ruined watching it on the CBS local feed, where you spend the entire time not watching your game, even if its a back and forth thriller, but watching the little scoreboard box, and getting excited or riled up over the slightest change in score.
As far as my theory goes, well it was 11-16 with teams ranking in four or more categories. Three of those teams that didn’t were Duke, Michigan St. and Villanova. All three of them got favorable draws against other middling teams but overall it seemed to hold up again.
In the end this year I’m surprised it held up as well as it did because there were so few mid-majors who excel under the radar.
I am definitely glad that I have grown up and kicked my NCAA gambling addiction, because Ball State over Tennessee absolutely would have ruined my women’s pool.
Stacey Dales, you are sorely missed on the women’s hoops analysis. Kara Lawson, you owe me 1,500 bucks from breaking my hd tv with your ugliness, and possibly burning my retinas beyond repair.
My all time Nemesis Boston University is the top overall seed in the NCAA hockey tournament, I cannot stress how hard I will be rooting for the Fighting Sioux of North Dakota to take them out. Especially since I always end up rooting for BC against UND, despite close family ties to the crew from Grand Forks. (population Quincy, Mass. Yet is the third largest city in ND)
For the first time in 15 years my honorary college is in the hockey tournament. The Northeastern Huskies are going to be the darlings of the tournament, or do like they always do in the Beanpot and choke in the end.
Let the chants of Sieve! and BU Sucks!!! begin. Go Huskies.
So much like the Little League World Series, the US lost to Japan (after all the Chinese Taipei guys were like 46) and our boys are going home. It’s good to see that Roy Oswalt, who got lit up in the final, will fit in well with the rest of the Astros, who are on track to make the ’03 Tigers look like the ’98 Yankees.
Had I still been in college while watching last night’s game, I think I would have enjoyed the Sadahara Oh drinking game. Basically if I took a drink every time the ESPN booth mentioned his name or the camera flashed to him, I would have had alcohol poisoning of epic proportions. Also known as the Jimmy Buffet edition.
(there I beat all of you who know me to the punch, so any comments will not get past the fictional ombudsman)
We get it, revered Japanese hero, they love him, hit lots of home runs. Alright enough already.
So Castro's son is apparently the trainer for Cuba? Does he also administer the beatings for potential defectors? Does he put players down like horses when they're too hurt to perform? I have lots of questions about this.
Is it like prison, do the Cuban hierarchy beat the hell out of one player to prevent mass defections? Or are there families held in a work commune together only to be released provided all players return?
Sticking with baseball momentarily, everyone knows Curt Schilling retired today, and it does start to mark the end of an era in my eyes.
The departure of Manny, and the instant aging of Varitek and Ortiz last year started the trend, but now the book is starting to close on the last team of my youth.
The group of idiots, and why not us, was the last team that featured all the players older than me, and was the last group I truly lived and died with every single day.
Schilling has been a polarizing figure here in new England the last couple years, but to me I love him. I don’t agree with his politics in the least, or many of his other opinions, but an athlete that candid about anything, and that thankful to be a ballplayer, and to the fans is ok in my book.
I still remember the chills I got as we cheered Schilling as he walked to the bullpen for the start of game 2 of the 04 World Series, for all you did Curt, I say thank you.
I tried today to explain the magnitude of what 2004 meant to me and everyone I know to a southerner today. The best equivalent I could come up with would be beating Florida in the BCS title game after trailing 28-0 after three quarters.
If you equate anything in life to college football…a southerner will understand you. I think that’s where Obama needs to go to garner support for his policies.
After driving to Myrtle Beach and back this week, I have to say, the state of South Carolina is a lot bigger than it looks on a map.
Myrtle Beach was nice, kinda looked like a cleaner Atlantic City, minus the drugs, hookers, Jersey trash and Casinos.
Which I guess makes it nothing like Atlantic City, oh well.
Most of my drunken ramblings about the NCAA tournament came and went, clearly I am more coherent and thoughtful sober, but I’m infinitely funnier drunk.
However, nothing sucks more than liking an upset and talking yourself out of it, only to see it come to fruition. I’m looking at you Cleveland St. And glancing with an evil eye at Wake Forest.
Overall it was kind of a dull first two rounds in my strictly for entertainment purposes bracket challenge against myself; I still have a pretty good shot to win, provided everything goes my way.
I was 13-16 in the Sweet 16, and frankly had I actually listened to some of my own research written below I might have been better. Instead I got drunk Wednesday night and put my picks in at 1am.
Like the good coach in me I'm more annoyed with the games I lost, particularly because they could have been prevented.
After spending the tournament in Vegas last year, I am forever ruined watching it on the CBS local feed, where you spend the entire time not watching your game, even if its a back and forth thriller, but watching the little scoreboard box, and getting excited or riled up over the slightest change in score.
As far as my theory goes, well it was 11-16 with teams ranking in four or more categories. Three of those teams that didn’t were Duke, Michigan St. and Villanova. All three of them got favorable draws against other middling teams but overall it seemed to hold up again.
In the end this year I’m surprised it held up as well as it did because there were so few mid-majors who excel under the radar.
I am definitely glad that I have grown up and kicked my NCAA gambling addiction, because Ball State over Tennessee absolutely would have ruined my women’s pool.
Stacey Dales, you are sorely missed on the women’s hoops analysis. Kara Lawson, you owe me 1,500 bucks from breaking my hd tv with your ugliness, and possibly burning my retinas beyond repair.
My all time Nemesis Boston University is the top overall seed in the NCAA hockey tournament, I cannot stress how hard I will be rooting for the Fighting Sioux of North Dakota to take them out. Especially since I always end up rooting for BC against UND, despite close family ties to the crew from Grand Forks. (population Quincy, Mass. Yet is the third largest city in ND)
For the first time in 15 years my honorary college is in the hockey tournament. The Northeastern Huskies are going to be the darlings of the tournament, or do like they always do in the Beanpot and choke in the end.
Let the chants of Sieve! and BU Sucks!!! begin. Go Huskies.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Tossing Batting Practice while wondering why you would ever cheer when the cameras come on you, and you’re announced as a 16 seed…
I’ve spent way too much time in my life, finding ways to cheat the system, and succeed in the NCAA “Brackets” (remember its not a pool, gambling is very very bad, shame on you!)
Perhaps I should devote more time to what DR. Emmett L. Brown once said was “the other great mystery in life, women.” But I digress.
The most productive, yet not completely scientific formula of that was spent on Gatehouse Media’s dime, and uses a little of the Bill Jamesian corollary.
Basketball is a largely difficult sport to quantify using just statistics however it can be done. I try to do it every year, as one of my basic tenets in filling out a bracket is finding teams that do a number of things well (novel concept I know) and in those tough games I compare the numbers against two teams.
What I discovered is that if you can successfully pick as many sweet 16 teams as possible, you’ll be in the running for your bracket championship. First round upsets are nice, but they’re only worth one or two points, and won’t leave much of a lasting impression.
As such I aim to get the sweet 16 right, and hope things take care of themselves from there.
What I look for is a team that ranks in the top 30 nationally in at least four categories and pinpoint them as a potential sweet 16 team. Sometimes the smaller conference teams rate highly in a bunch because they play poor competition, but sometimes they don’t and its up to you to determine what’s an important category and what isn’t.
I look are three point offense and defense, rebounding, turnovers, and free throws as most important but it’s subjective.
For perspective George Mason thrived in 5 statistical categories in 2006, there are other examples, and while it seems rather obvious, sometimes when you go back and look at teams that were allegedly “upset” they only did one thing well, like Duke last year upset in the second round, only did three things well.
This season the NCAA has added a couple new Categories, so I’m going to increase the number to five categories in the top 30 make a sweet 16 team. It’s not scientific, but if you know what teams do well and what they don’t you can help determine who’s going to win those games you usually flip a coin on.
One wrinkle I added last year was the adjusted rankings, because sometimes offensive and defensive scoring numbers are skewed because teams play fast or slow, thus efficiency on offense and defense are far more important.
Traditionally I have found between 8-13 teams per season, depending on the parity of the NCAA will excel in at least four (this year I’m trying 5 to experiment, but 4 might still be the working model) categories, as I look at the numbers sometimes a team may not excel, (i.e. top 30) but might do a lot above average (between 31-65) those are usually the teams that throw the wrinkle off.
I wrote 46 teams breakdowns out on who has a shot at the sweet 16, they were don before the brackets came out, I mean I’m not going to do all your work for you, and make the picks.
Below you will find the teams, the first 25 are the latest top 25 poll, after that they’re in no particular order. I shied away from a lot of 8 and 9 seeds because they almost never make the sweet 16 and it was kind of a waste of an hour of my life to research them. Some of them are done because I had them higher or lower earlier in the week.
The way it works is the team, and then how many categories they excel in, followed by their adjusted for pace rankings, and some notes.
I don’t expect anyone to read them all, but feel free to look for the teams you aren’t sure about and hopefully they help, unless you’re in the pool I am in. Then screw off.
Team – (Number of categories in top 30) Adj off/def…notes
North Carolina (9) 1/23...Is the best offensive team in the country, high FG%, doesn’t turn it over, defensive numbers are skewed by the fast pace they play. Real active on defense, forces a lot of turnovers, probably unbeatable in a track meet. Their rebounding margin, and A/TO ratio are incredible and debunk some of the myths about their lack of toughness.
Louisville (5) – 46/2…Slightly above average offense and defense numbers, tremendous FG% defense, shoots and defends the three well; unselfish (doesn’t rely on one scorer) Free throws are a problem.
Pittsburgh (6) 3/38…Offensively they’re a little stronger than Pitt teams of the past, defensively they’re weaker. Near the top in rebounding margin, so they can overpower weaker teams, but probably don’t shoot from outside well enough to beat a tougher team.
If Blair gets in foul trouble all bets are off. They don’t turn the ball over, and get a lot of easy buckets, but could struggle against a tough defensive team that can shoot from outside.
UConn (6) 22/3…Very strong and can over power teams, but struggle to make shots from outside, and not great from the line. If they end up at the Garden there’s no way they lose in the regionals. Defensively they wear you out, and can probably only be beaten by a Big East team, or UNC unless Thabeet gets in foul trouble early. However a superhuman effort from a guard could get them.
Memphis (7) 43/1…Numbers are skewed slightly because they play awful competition, but they defend like crazy inside and on the perimeter, they rebound and don’t turn the ball over too much. Offensively they struggle from the field, and at the line and suck from beyond the arc. A sound halfcourt team that executes on offense will give them the most trouble, provided they can defend a little bit.
Oklahoma (4) 7/47… Not as statistically sound as one would like. The things they excel in (FG% and rebound margin) are essentially because Griffin is the POY, he hasn’t been the same since the concussion and neither has OU. They are an average shooting team and average defensively; they turn it over too much and don’t force enough. It all hinges on Griffin and who they matchup with.
Wake Forest (6) 34/14…They score pretty easily, but are terrible beyond the arc; are actually sound defensively forcing steals and turnovers. They are the youngest team in the top 10 and it shows at times turning the ball over too much; a bad matchup against a team like Louisville or Memphis
Duke (3) 6/13…This is one of those anomalies sometimes because it doesn’t doing anything exceptionally well, but doesn’t do anything badly either. Their adjusted numbers make up for not hitting the magic number of 4. Only an average shooting team, so a tough perimeter defending team could be a problem. Probably a Sweet 16 team but no more, could be upset in the 2nd round against an athletically superior small conference opponent.
Michigan St. (2) 27/10…We’ll know after the first weekend if the big 10 was better than we thought or it sucked. They struggle at the foul line, and don’t force a lot of turnovers, but make scoring difficult, and rebound like crazy. If a more skilled team matches their toughness they’re done.
Villanova (1) 19/26…They are a guard oriented team that doesn’t shoot the three well, and turns it over more than it should the toughness of the Big East should help them. A team with some size that gets after it defensively would be a tough matchup.
Kansas (4) 20/16…I haven’t liked them all season, but the things they excel at are important, the shoot well, and defend on the perimeter well, rebounding they are solid, but much of that is Aldrich, who is foul prone. They turn it over a little too much, and don’t force many mistakes. A good shooting team that doesn’t turn it over will send them home. As could an athletically superior team.
Gonzaga – (8) 5/12…Their numbers are skewed as well because of poor competition, and they crapped the bed against Memphis at home, They can play fast or slow, and defend well inside. However a team that shoots the 3 well, or a big strong team inside like a Big 10 or Big East team will eventually send them home.
Washington (2) 33/11…They can score, but mainly because they play at a fast pace; they don’t force many turnovers, and give it away too much, and don’t shoot the three well What they do, do well is rebound, and score on offensive rebounds. A team that can match their rebounding, and shoot well eliminates them.
Missouri (6) 16/15…They play a frenetic pace, so they score a ton, and defend pretty well, they don’t turn it over much either; but they struggle to rebound, and make free throws, foul trouble is a problem too, so a good FT shooting team that gets into the bonus early could send them home.
But a legit sleeper pick, especially if they don’t win the Big 12 tourney.
UCLA (5) 2/45…One of the most efficient offensive teams in the country, but doesn’t defend well, compared to UCLA teams of the past, they do still force a lot of turnovers, but allow a lot of easy baskets, a team that shoots well and defends the interior will send them home, but could be a tough out for a lot of pretenders or teams without experience.
Butler (2) 59/46…The don’t allow easy baskets, and will likely win a first round game if they get another mid-major, but that’s as far as they’ll go. They don’t do anything else really well, and you can’t beat good teams that way.
Clemson (4) 9/51…They can score and shoot the ball well, but defensively they suck, and they don’t rebound very well either, they could be first round fodder for a good statistically sound mid-major.
Syracuse (6) 12/37…The orange have good scoring numbers, and defend the three well; they don’t shoot free throws well, and turn the ball over a little too much, but if they aren’t gassed from the Big East Tourney they could be a tough out.
They don’t foul much (UConn only shot 22 free throws in that 6ot epic) so they make teams earn their points, which could be a tough thing for an offensively challenged team to do to beat them.
Xavier (4) 40/24…They defend well and shoot the 3 at a high percentage, and they can rebound. What scares me is the turn the ball over a lot, struggle at the foul line, and don’t create a lot of turnovers either. A good shooting team that defends on the perimeter can send them packing.
LSU (3) 47/56…The SEC sucked this year, and these numbers prove it, I the Tigers don’t really do anything well except rebound , block shots, and shoot free throws. All nice things, and their athleticism might help over a mid-major, but they’ll fall to a more skilled team that can match the athleticism.
Marquette (4) 8/55…The things they do well, are all guard oriented but they only have half that tandem now with the injury to Domenic James. They are poor defensively in all facets, and will bow out to a superior offensive team that exploits those defensive deficiencies.
Florida State (2) 113/9…Defensively they’re strong in a conference not known for much defense, but are poor offensively. Couple that with no tournament experience, and you can pencil them out early. They turn the ball over a lot, and don’t shoot very well.
Arizona St. (7) 11/28… They’re in the top 30 in 7 categories, and top 35 in 10. So they are statistically strong almost everywhere. They are suspect rebounding, and while they’re efficient on offense, getting into a track meet probably doesn’t suit them. They are a strong sleeper, with two big time scorers, a solid defense, and good coaching in the tournament (remember those multiple sweet 16 trips Herb Sendek made at NC St.)
Arizona (2) 7/132…They shoot the ball well, but don’t defend very well from the field, or in forcing turnovers. If they get a bad defensive team they could last a game or two but anyone who can score and defend even a little sends them home.
USC (1) 62/19…They defend very well, and rebound and could steal a game with that combination, an efficient offensive team that forces turnovers is their bad matchup.
BC (1) 27/131…They are here on the strength of two wins, perhaps my BC bias is taking over but I just don’t believe in them at all to do much of anything.
Minnesota (2) 88/20….They defend pretty well, but struggle to score and shoot, they also turn it over too much.
Wisconsin (3) 24/60 Typical Wisconsin team, defends, doesn’t foul or turn it over, they’re pretty efficient on offense though, could make for a surprise.
Michigan (5) 41/67…Like his WVU teams of the past John Belien leads in a lot of seemingly random categories that add up to March success, three point shooting, few turnovers, very few fouls, the contrast is their efficiency numbers aren’t as high as I’d like. They struggle to rebound, and don’t shoot a high percentage, could be a first round winner, unlikely beyond that unless they are matched up with a team that hasn’t seen the 1-3-1 on defense before it’s tough to prepare for on short notice.
Texas (1) 46/27…They don’t do a lot very well, they don’t do a lot poorly either other than shooting threes, however if Abrams gets hot he could be a difference maker. They defend pretty well and rebound.
Dayton (1) 144/41…Don’t do much well, they defend pretty good, but they struggle to score, or shoot from anywhere, and they turn it over a little too much.
BYU (6) 24/17….Another intriguing option, they shoot the ball well, and defend very well. Obviously against inferior competition, but provided they don’t draw an ultra athletic team early they could stick around through the first weekend.
Purdue (5) 67/5…The only other Big 10 team I like besides Mich. St. Purdue’s offensive numbers aren’t good because their best player has been hurt all year. They don’t shoot that well, but if Hummel is healthy that’s an upgrade. Rebounding is an issue for them, which is odd given how well they defend/
Cleveland St. (3) 121/30…An intriguing team defensively, they get after you, force turnovers, and steals, and preotect the ball offensively, they don’t rebound well and aren’t a good shooting team, but getting into a track meet with them and they could upset you.
California (5) 10/87…They are the best 3 point shooting team in the country, but they only make about 6 a game, they shoot very well, and don’t turn it over, defensively they aren’t very good, so a team that struggles to score, or doesn’t defend well could kepp them alive, but teams that do defend will make it tough for them.
Akron (3) 153/50 Doesn’t shoot very well or rebound well, is pretty good defensively, but unless they get a big 10 team that struggles to score they’ll be going home early.
Illinois (6) 96/4…They are so efficient on defense and make it difficult to score, but some of that is a product of the big 10, some of it isn’t. On offense it’s the same story, The loss of their PG who may or may not be back will be an issue as well because they don’t turn it over and move the ball with him, but without him not so much.
Western Kentucky (0) 68/168 They shoot the three ok, and are decent on the glass, but I don’t see a duplicate of last year’s first round magic.
West Virginia (5) 16/7They defend the three, rebound, and don’t turn it over, however unlike WVU teams of the past they are a bad shooting team. They are efficient on offense and exceptionally so on defense, all in all a tough out for anyone.
Utah (4) 51/21…They are very tough defensively but they don’t force many turnovers, so matched up with a good shooting team and they’re going home. Offensively they can shoot the three at a high percentage and a terrific free throw shooting team.
Utah St. (7) 13/169…They are poor defensively especially against the three. They have a lot of good numbers because of an easy schedule, but they are very efficient offensively, they shoot very well, inside and from 3, they rebound well, don’t turn it over and stay out of foul trouble. They can win a slow down game, but not a track meet.
Texas A&M (0) 37/79….They will rebound the basketball, and that’s about it, pack lightly Aggie fans. They are an average team across the board, don’t do anything well, but nothing critically poor. Except maybe defending the three. Matched up against anyone who does anything well and they’ll be done, against another average team it’s a toss up.
Tennessee (3) 15/75 Typical UT team, they try to go up and down and play at a fast pace, they don’t shoot the three well though which is a problem because they like to chuck them up. If they can’t create turnovers on defense and score easy buckets they’re in trouble.
Siena (4) (49/89)…Everybody’s trendy pick which usually results in an early trip home. They play at a fast pace, so their defensive numbers are pretty low, but they aren’t as efficient as I would like; They don’t shoot threes well, and are poor at the line. They rely on getting easy baskets, either off the dribble, or in transition creating turnovers, which they do fairly well, almost 9 steals a game. Rebounding could be their eventual demise.
Miss. St. (2) 69/66 They shoot a ton of threes, at a decent percentage, but that’s about it. They block a ton of shots, but that’s because of Varnado. I don’t see them doing anything well enough to win in the tournament, unless they get a slow mid-major that gets into a track meet with them.
VCU (1) 75/49…Great FG% defense but doesn’t do anything else spectacular, played in a pretty tough mid-major conference; they shoot the 3 well, and are active forcing turnovers, they struggle to rebound, and foul often, so a strong rebounding and FT shooting team is their Achilles.
ND State (5) 32/139…A potential sleeper with the right matchup. Offensively they are very efficient, and shoot the ball very well, especially from three point land.
They are a pretty good rebounding team and don’t turnover it over much. Defensively they are porous, a plodding big 10 team is their ideal matchup, especially one that doesn’t shoot very well.
Maryland (2) 74/48 They shoot free throws well and don’t turn it over; they don’t shoot it that well, don’t rebound and don’t defend the three. An up and down game would be their best chance to succeed.
Northern Iowa (2) 57/127…Typical white kids, they shoot free throws well, and don’t turn it over, they aren’t strong defensively on the perimeter but if forced into a slow down game they could be knock a team off. The MVC probably wasn’t strong enough this year for them to make it to the second weekend.
I’ve spent way too much time in my life, finding ways to cheat the system, and succeed in the NCAA “Brackets” (remember its not a pool, gambling is very very bad, shame on you!)
Perhaps I should devote more time to what DR. Emmett L. Brown once said was “the other great mystery in life, women.” But I digress.
The most productive, yet not completely scientific formula of that was spent on Gatehouse Media’s dime, and uses a little of the Bill Jamesian corollary.
Basketball is a largely difficult sport to quantify using just statistics however it can be done. I try to do it every year, as one of my basic tenets in filling out a bracket is finding teams that do a number of things well (novel concept I know) and in those tough games I compare the numbers against two teams.
What I discovered is that if you can successfully pick as many sweet 16 teams as possible, you’ll be in the running for your bracket championship. First round upsets are nice, but they’re only worth one or two points, and won’t leave much of a lasting impression.
As such I aim to get the sweet 16 right, and hope things take care of themselves from there.
What I look for is a team that ranks in the top 30 nationally in at least four categories and pinpoint them as a potential sweet 16 team. Sometimes the smaller conference teams rate highly in a bunch because they play poor competition, but sometimes they don’t and its up to you to determine what’s an important category and what isn’t.
I look are three point offense and defense, rebounding, turnovers, and free throws as most important but it’s subjective.
For perspective George Mason thrived in 5 statistical categories in 2006, there are other examples, and while it seems rather obvious, sometimes when you go back and look at teams that were allegedly “upset” they only did one thing well, like Duke last year upset in the second round, only did three things well.
This season the NCAA has added a couple new Categories, so I’m going to increase the number to five categories in the top 30 make a sweet 16 team. It’s not scientific, but if you know what teams do well and what they don’t you can help determine who’s going to win those games you usually flip a coin on.
One wrinkle I added last year was the adjusted rankings, because sometimes offensive and defensive scoring numbers are skewed because teams play fast or slow, thus efficiency on offense and defense are far more important.
Traditionally I have found between 8-13 teams per season, depending on the parity of the NCAA will excel in at least four (this year I’m trying 5 to experiment, but 4 might still be the working model) categories, as I look at the numbers sometimes a team may not excel, (i.e. top 30) but might do a lot above average (between 31-65) those are usually the teams that throw the wrinkle off.
I wrote 46 teams breakdowns out on who has a shot at the sweet 16, they were don before the brackets came out, I mean I’m not going to do all your work for you, and make the picks.
Below you will find the teams, the first 25 are the latest top 25 poll, after that they’re in no particular order. I shied away from a lot of 8 and 9 seeds because they almost never make the sweet 16 and it was kind of a waste of an hour of my life to research them. Some of them are done because I had them higher or lower earlier in the week.
The way it works is the team, and then how many categories they excel in, followed by their adjusted for pace rankings, and some notes.
I don’t expect anyone to read them all, but feel free to look for the teams you aren’t sure about and hopefully they help, unless you’re in the pool I am in. Then screw off.
Team – (Number of categories in top 30) Adj off/def…notes
North Carolina (9) 1/23...Is the best offensive team in the country, high FG%, doesn’t turn it over, defensive numbers are skewed by the fast pace they play. Real active on defense, forces a lot of turnovers, probably unbeatable in a track meet. Their rebounding margin, and A/TO ratio are incredible and debunk some of the myths about their lack of toughness.
Louisville (5) – 46/2…Slightly above average offense and defense numbers, tremendous FG% defense, shoots and defends the three well; unselfish (doesn’t rely on one scorer) Free throws are a problem.
Pittsburgh (6) 3/38…Offensively they’re a little stronger than Pitt teams of the past, defensively they’re weaker. Near the top in rebounding margin, so they can overpower weaker teams, but probably don’t shoot from outside well enough to beat a tougher team.
If Blair gets in foul trouble all bets are off. They don’t turn the ball over, and get a lot of easy buckets, but could struggle against a tough defensive team that can shoot from outside.
UConn (6) 22/3…Very strong and can over power teams, but struggle to make shots from outside, and not great from the line. If they end up at the Garden there’s no way they lose in the regionals. Defensively they wear you out, and can probably only be beaten by a Big East team, or UNC unless Thabeet gets in foul trouble early. However a superhuman effort from a guard could get them.
Memphis (7) 43/1…Numbers are skewed slightly because they play awful competition, but they defend like crazy inside and on the perimeter, they rebound and don’t turn the ball over too much. Offensively they struggle from the field, and at the line and suck from beyond the arc. A sound halfcourt team that executes on offense will give them the most trouble, provided they can defend a little bit.
Oklahoma (4) 7/47… Not as statistically sound as one would like. The things they excel in (FG% and rebound margin) are essentially because Griffin is the POY, he hasn’t been the same since the concussion and neither has OU. They are an average shooting team and average defensively; they turn it over too much and don’t force enough. It all hinges on Griffin and who they matchup with.
Wake Forest (6) 34/14…They score pretty easily, but are terrible beyond the arc; are actually sound defensively forcing steals and turnovers. They are the youngest team in the top 10 and it shows at times turning the ball over too much; a bad matchup against a team like Louisville or Memphis
Duke (3) 6/13…This is one of those anomalies sometimes because it doesn’t doing anything exceptionally well, but doesn’t do anything badly either. Their adjusted numbers make up for not hitting the magic number of 4. Only an average shooting team, so a tough perimeter defending team could be a problem. Probably a Sweet 16 team but no more, could be upset in the 2nd round against an athletically superior small conference opponent.
Michigan St. (2) 27/10…We’ll know after the first weekend if the big 10 was better than we thought or it sucked. They struggle at the foul line, and don’t force a lot of turnovers, but make scoring difficult, and rebound like crazy. If a more skilled team matches their toughness they’re done.
Villanova (1) 19/26…They are a guard oriented team that doesn’t shoot the three well, and turns it over more than it should the toughness of the Big East should help them. A team with some size that gets after it defensively would be a tough matchup.
Kansas (4) 20/16…I haven’t liked them all season, but the things they excel at are important, the shoot well, and defend on the perimeter well, rebounding they are solid, but much of that is Aldrich, who is foul prone. They turn it over a little too much, and don’t force many mistakes. A good shooting team that doesn’t turn it over will send them home. As could an athletically superior team.
Gonzaga – (8) 5/12…Their numbers are skewed as well because of poor competition, and they crapped the bed against Memphis at home, They can play fast or slow, and defend well inside. However a team that shoots the 3 well, or a big strong team inside like a Big 10 or Big East team will eventually send them home.
Washington (2) 33/11…They can score, but mainly because they play at a fast pace; they don’t force many turnovers, and give it away too much, and don’t shoot the three well What they do, do well is rebound, and score on offensive rebounds. A team that can match their rebounding, and shoot well eliminates them.
Missouri (6) 16/15…They play a frenetic pace, so they score a ton, and defend pretty well, they don’t turn it over much either; but they struggle to rebound, and make free throws, foul trouble is a problem too, so a good FT shooting team that gets into the bonus early could send them home.
But a legit sleeper pick, especially if they don’t win the Big 12 tourney.
UCLA (5) 2/45…One of the most efficient offensive teams in the country, but doesn’t defend well, compared to UCLA teams of the past, they do still force a lot of turnovers, but allow a lot of easy baskets, a team that shoots well and defends the interior will send them home, but could be a tough out for a lot of pretenders or teams without experience.
Butler (2) 59/46…The don’t allow easy baskets, and will likely win a first round game if they get another mid-major, but that’s as far as they’ll go. They don’t do anything else really well, and you can’t beat good teams that way.
Clemson (4) 9/51…They can score and shoot the ball well, but defensively they suck, and they don’t rebound very well either, they could be first round fodder for a good statistically sound mid-major.
Syracuse (6) 12/37…The orange have good scoring numbers, and defend the three well; they don’t shoot free throws well, and turn the ball over a little too much, but if they aren’t gassed from the Big East Tourney they could be a tough out.
They don’t foul much (UConn only shot 22 free throws in that 6ot epic) so they make teams earn their points, which could be a tough thing for an offensively challenged team to do to beat them.
Xavier (4) 40/24…They defend well and shoot the 3 at a high percentage, and they can rebound. What scares me is the turn the ball over a lot, struggle at the foul line, and don’t create a lot of turnovers either. A good shooting team that defends on the perimeter can send them packing.
LSU (3) 47/56…The SEC sucked this year, and these numbers prove it, I the Tigers don’t really do anything well except rebound , block shots, and shoot free throws. All nice things, and their athleticism might help over a mid-major, but they’ll fall to a more skilled team that can match the athleticism.
Marquette (4) 8/55…The things they do well, are all guard oriented but they only have half that tandem now with the injury to Domenic James. They are poor defensively in all facets, and will bow out to a superior offensive team that exploits those defensive deficiencies.
Florida State (2) 113/9…Defensively they’re strong in a conference not known for much defense, but are poor offensively. Couple that with no tournament experience, and you can pencil them out early. They turn the ball over a lot, and don’t shoot very well.
Arizona St. (7) 11/28… They’re in the top 30 in 7 categories, and top 35 in 10. So they are statistically strong almost everywhere. They are suspect rebounding, and while they’re efficient on offense, getting into a track meet probably doesn’t suit them. They are a strong sleeper, with two big time scorers, a solid defense, and good coaching in the tournament (remember those multiple sweet 16 trips Herb Sendek made at NC St.)
Arizona (2) 7/132…They shoot the ball well, but don’t defend very well from the field, or in forcing turnovers. If they get a bad defensive team they could last a game or two but anyone who can score and defend even a little sends them home.
USC (1) 62/19…They defend very well, and rebound and could steal a game with that combination, an efficient offensive team that forces turnovers is their bad matchup.
BC (1) 27/131…They are here on the strength of two wins, perhaps my BC bias is taking over but I just don’t believe in them at all to do much of anything.
Minnesota (2) 88/20….They defend pretty well, but struggle to score and shoot, they also turn it over too much.
Wisconsin (3) 24/60 Typical Wisconsin team, defends, doesn’t foul or turn it over, they’re pretty efficient on offense though, could make for a surprise.
Michigan (5) 41/67…Like his WVU teams of the past John Belien leads in a lot of seemingly random categories that add up to March success, three point shooting, few turnovers, very few fouls, the contrast is their efficiency numbers aren’t as high as I’d like. They struggle to rebound, and don’t shoot a high percentage, could be a first round winner, unlikely beyond that unless they are matched up with a team that hasn’t seen the 1-3-1 on defense before it’s tough to prepare for on short notice.
Texas (1) 46/27…They don’t do a lot very well, they don’t do a lot poorly either other than shooting threes, however if Abrams gets hot he could be a difference maker. They defend pretty well and rebound.
Dayton (1) 144/41…Don’t do much well, they defend pretty good, but they struggle to score, or shoot from anywhere, and they turn it over a little too much.
BYU (6) 24/17….Another intriguing option, they shoot the ball well, and defend very well. Obviously against inferior competition, but provided they don’t draw an ultra athletic team early they could stick around through the first weekend.
Purdue (5) 67/5…The only other Big 10 team I like besides Mich. St. Purdue’s offensive numbers aren’t good because their best player has been hurt all year. They don’t shoot that well, but if Hummel is healthy that’s an upgrade. Rebounding is an issue for them, which is odd given how well they defend/
Cleveland St. (3) 121/30…An intriguing team defensively, they get after you, force turnovers, and steals, and preotect the ball offensively, they don’t rebound well and aren’t a good shooting team, but getting into a track meet with them and they could upset you.
California (5) 10/87…They are the best 3 point shooting team in the country, but they only make about 6 a game, they shoot very well, and don’t turn it over, defensively they aren’t very good, so a team that struggles to score, or doesn’t defend well could kepp them alive, but teams that do defend will make it tough for them.
Akron (3) 153/50 Doesn’t shoot very well or rebound well, is pretty good defensively, but unless they get a big 10 team that struggles to score they’ll be going home early.
Illinois (6) 96/4…They are so efficient on defense and make it difficult to score, but some of that is a product of the big 10, some of it isn’t. On offense it’s the same story, The loss of their PG who may or may not be back will be an issue as well because they don’t turn it over and move the ball with him, but without him not so much.
Western Kentucky (0) 68/168 They shoot the three ok, and are decent on the glass, but I don’t see a duplicate of last year’s first round magic.
West Virginia (5) 16/7They defend the three, rebound, and don’t turn it over, however unlike WVU teams of the past they are a bad shooting team. They are efficient on offense and exceptionally so on defense, all in all a tough out for anyone.
Utah (4) 51/21…They are very tough defensively but they don’t force many turnovers, so matched up with a good shooting team and they’re going home. Offensively they can shoot the three at a high percentage and a terrific free throw shooting team.
Utah St. (7) 13/169…They are poor defensively especially against the three. They have a lot of good numbers because of an easy schedule, but they are very efficient offensively, they shoot very well, inside and from 3, they rebound well, don’t turn it over and stay out of foul trouble. They can win a slow down game, but not a track meet.
Texas A&M (0) 37/79….They will rebound the basketball, and that’s about it, pack lightly Aggie fans. They are an average team across the board, don’t do anything well, but nothing critically poor. Except maybe defending the three. Matched up against anyone who does anything well and they’ll be done, against another average team it’s a toss up.
Tennessee (3) 15/75 Typical UT team, they try to go up and down and play at a fast pace, they don’t shoot the three well though which is a problem because they like to chuck them up. If they can’t create turnovers on defense and score easy buckets they’re in trouble.
Siena (4) (49/89)…Everybody’s trendy pick which usually results in an early trip home. They play at a fast pace, so their defensive numbers are pretty low, but they aren’t as efficient as I would like; They don’t shoot threes well, and are poor at the line. They rely on getting easy baskets, either off the dribble, or in transition creating turnovers, which they do fairly well, almost 9 steals a game. Rebounding could be their eventual demise.
Miss. St. (2) 69/66 They shoot a ton of threes, at a decent percentage, but that’s about it. They block a ton of shots, but that’s because of Varnado. I don’t see them doing anything well enough to win in the tournament, unless they get a slow mid-major that gets into a track meet with them.
VCU (1) 75/49…Great FG% defense but doesn’t do anything else spectacular, played in a pretty tough mid-major conference; they shoot the 3 well, and are active forcing turnovers, they struggle to rebound, and foul often, so a strong rebounding and FT shooting team is their Achilles.
ND State (5) 32/139…A potential sleeper with the right matchup. Offensively they are very efficient, and shoot the ball very well, especially from three point land.
They are a pretty good rebounding team and don’t turnover it over much. Defensively they are porous, a plodding big 10 team is their ideal matchup, especially one that doesn’t shoot very well.
Maryland (2) 74/48 They shoot free throws well and don’t turn it over; they don’t shoot it that well, don’t rebound and don’t defend the three. An up and down game would be their best chance to succeed.
Northern Iowa (2) 57/127…Typical white kids, they shoot free throws well, and don’t turn it over, they aren’t strong defensively on the perimeter but if forced into a slow down game they could be knock a team off. The MVC probably wasn’t strong enough this year for them to make it to the second weekend.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Tossing batting practice…while wondering if Ted Sarandis kidnapped Sean McDonough during the first overtime, and announced the final 25 minutes of the game.
McDonough’s voice hit octaves last night that was previously unseen or heard in any experience I remember of him.
It never fails, if you wave off a buzzer beater at the end of regulation, you can prepare yourself for a very very long night. Let that be a lesson to you young officials out there. Overtime is not your friend, and your per diem doesn’t increase if it takes three days to determine a winner.
It doesn’t matter that they basically played a third fourth half, I’m pretty sure Jim Calhoun is berating his players for allowing 100 127 points.
The fourth fifth sixth (?!?!) overtime, was the stuff of dreams…for the walkons at the end of both benches. You know they sit in class day dreaming about getting inserted into the game after the first 10 guys have fouled out, got hurt, or become academically ineligible in the middle of a game that seemingly lasted two semesters.
The five six overtime thriller was made all the better when I caught this nugget of a story. Last week’s featured friend Ryan, actually went to the afternoon games, but sold his night session tickets. That accurately sums up Ryan, who right now is working on a self deprecating script of his own life, yet its far too pathetic to be real.
I think the stat “fast break points” should stop after a second overtime, and changed to “slow controlled jog points.”
If you’ve ever played and lasted deep into an AAU tournament (or been on a kick ass pickup team that won’t lose) you know how both teams must have felt by the end. UConn especially looked like an AAU team in OT no. 6 as they just wildly chucked threes and played no perimeter defense.
Calhoun probably had practice at Storrs, at 6am, and if its spring break at UConn he might have had double sessions.
He even stated in his postgame presser he wasn’t tired and could go to practice right away.
I love him because of his miserable ornery persona because its funny, particularly if you’ve played for someone like that, but I can see what it rubs the rest of America the wrong way.
I’m sure there’s No doubt he was wearing that miserable glare, asking rhetorically “how can I play you, if you won’t work hard on defense in the sixth overtime, after four hours of real time playing?” Now if Calhoun is anything like my college coach, which I think he is, the rest would play something along the lines of “shut up! Shut the f*#! Up!” if anybody actually tried to answer the rhetorical question.
So apparently the espn live blog update on the game allows people to vote whether or night they like this game. Beyond my initial question of why would anyone who is reading the in game boxscore vote negatively for any game, only 97.2% of people seem to like this six OT thriller. Seriously, those 2.8% of people have to be the most miserable group of people on earth, probably the folks who call into the Big Show and Mike Adams regularly.
McDonough’s voice hit octaves last night that was previously unseen or heard in any experience I remember of him.
It never fails, if you wave off a buzzer beater at the end of regulation, you can prepare yourself for a very very long night. Let that be a lesson to you young officials out there. Overtime is not your friend, and your per diem doesn’t increase if it takes three days to determine a winner.
It doesn’t matter that they basically played a third fourth half, I’m pretty sure Jim Calhoun is berating his players for allowing 100 127 points.
The fourth fifth sixth (?!?!) overtime, was the stuff of dreams…for the walkons at the end of both benches. You know they sit in class day dreaming about getting inserted into the game after the first 10 guys have fouled out, got hurt, or become academically ineligible in the middle of a game that seemingly lasted two semesters.
The five six overtime thriller was made all the better when I caught this nugget of a story. Last week’s featured friend Ryan, actually went to the afternoon games, but sold his night session tickets. That accurately sums up Ryan, who right now is working on a self deprecating script of his own life, yet its far too pathetic to be real.
I think the stat “fast break points” should stop after a second overtime, and changed to “slow controlled jog points.”
If you’ve ever played and lasted deep into an AAU tournament (or been on a kick ass pickup team that won’t lose) you know how both teams must have felt by the end. UConn especially looked like an AAU team in OT no. 6 as they just wildly chucked threes and played no perimeter defense.
Calhoun probably had practice at Storrs, at 6am, and if its spring break at UConn he might have had double sessions.
He even stated in his postgame presser he wasn’t tired and could go to practice right away.
I love him because of his miserable ornery persona because its funny, particularly if you’ve played for someone like that, but I can see what it rubs the rest of America the wrong way.
I’m sure there’s No doubt he was wearing that miserable glare, asking rhetorically “how can I play you, if you won’t work hard on defense in the sixth overtime, after four hours of real time playing?” Now if Calhoun is anything like my college coach, which I think he is, the rest would play something along the lines of “shut up! Shut the f*#! Up!” if anybody actually tried to answer the rhetorical question.
So apparently the espn live blog update on the game allows people to vote whether or night they like this game. Beyond my initial question of why would anyone who is reading the in game boxscore vote negatively for any game, only 97.2% of people seem to like this six OT thriller. Seriously, those 2.8% of people have to be the most miserable group of people on earth, probably the folks who call into the Big Show and Mike Adams regularly.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Tossing batting practice, while wondering who the fifth, sixth, and seventh teams are in and out of the NCAA tournament.
I have majored in bracketology since I was about 9, (thanks Dad) and completed my final core requirement to graduate last year by spending the opening weekend of the tourney in Vegas, “watching, just watching” games, so I think I have a pretty good grasp on the NCAAs. But it drives me nuts whenever I see the last four in and last four out column.
If you’re a fan of any other bubble (I promise not to use that word again in this blog) team do you feel better, worse, or unfulfilled after seeing that update?
Who has a cooler, but more useless job to society, Draft Exper Mel Kiper Jr. or Bracketologist Joe Lunardi?
With a 10 hour bus ride to Mississippi to look forward too this weekend I should have ample time to work on my fool proof Bill Jamesian pool strategy, that is almost guaranteed to have at least 12 sweet 16 teams correctly identified.
Who is the Dutch Al Michaels? and how do you say "doyou believe in miracles?" in Flemish?
See even teams ARod begs off of, can't win the big one. No matter what now though the US can't be the most disappointing team in the tournament. And the Sox get David Ortiz back a little earlier. A win win for all Amierican Sox fans involved.
Last week it was too cold, this week it’s damn hot, judging by the fact I look like a lobster from a weekend in Tennessee. But clearly my car has yet to understand the change in geography and with it climate.
I got into it the other day and the digital temperature said it was 39 degrees and had the snowflake icon.
It was in fact 77 degrees.
After a weekend in Volunteer country, I think my retinas are permanently tinted Creamsicle orange.
I finally saw the infamous Rabun county and the Tallulah Gorge this week. The scenery was incredible, but my god I thought the flux capacitor had been activated on the bus and sent me back 125 years.
That area of the world makes Vermont look like Manhattan.
So A-Rod’s having surgery huh, eh, he still sucks.
It was hard not to root for North Dakota St. in the Summitt league final the other night. They’re in their first year of Division 1 tournament eligibility, and they send out a full whitewash of five Caucasian starters.
They epitomize a Norman Dale coached team, rebounds below the rim, solid passing and screening etc.
Is it a stereotype to also announce that they lead the nation in three-point shooting? Is that kind of assumed, like Pitt leading the nation in rebound margin?
Were NDSU and Pitt matched up in the NCAAs there wouldn’t have been a more contrasting set of styles since the 1954 Indiana State high school title game.
I know I said it was hard to root against NDSU, but I did for two simple reasons.
1. I have family closely related to the University of North Dakota, and you’re only allowed to root for one, I think.
2. In writing the Summit league preview for Blue Ribbon a year ago, I picked Oakland to win it, and despite being a year late, I feel vindicated. Slightly.
There are plenty of good seats still available for the Braves home opener, and after seeing one of their commercials I know why. It was one of those fan interview deals, where they ask everyone what they love about the Braves, and you mostly got your standard answers of Derek Lowe, Tom Glavine, Chipper Jones, but there was one that stuck out.
The shapely blonde woman in her twenties who claims she loves watching Bobby Cox; After all there's nothing sexier than a 70 year old man waddling out to make 3 pitching changes a night
According to a recent study organized religion, in America, particularly those who identify themselves as Christian has dropped 11 percent in the last 15 years; meanwhile I'm praying before games, something doesn't quite add up
Driving to Tennessee though the mountains was like going through the Berkshires only for three hrs. It was basically every ride I ever took to Ludlow to visit a former significant other’s mother, minus the sense of impending doom and misery hanging ominously in the room.
So TO has been banished to Buffalo huh? That seems appropriate, there are only two reasons to go to Buffalo, one is if someone offers you millions of dollars and there are no offers anywhere else. The other is if a woman will willingly date, or have sex with you, and again you can't find anyone anywhere else.
TO has done one, and a friend of mine is the other.
I am glad we didn't have to spend countless days and weeks speculating that the Pats might swoop in. I would have eventually talked myself into it, but selling my soul like that would have only been worth it were we to finish what we started with that whole unbeaten business.
Now I can go back to hating him unequivocally; if Ralph Wilson has a sense of humor, or actually has gone into dementia (he is 137 years old and played before helmets) he'd sign Michael Vick too.
By request we’re adding more photos to the blog, and with that, is this week’s photo of my friend from college the immortal (only in his own world,) Ryan who hails from Rhode Island which he will immediately tell you upon introduction.
Ryan is the son of a town elected public official, and one of the great tacklers in the history of his High School football, from his safety position. I think the term yards after catch was invented to convince Ryan to play basketball in college. He also possesses a microscopic collegiate baseball era of 46.00 over 10 innings, in two separate seasons four years apart.
On the basketball court he was an excellent sixth offensive option for the EC Lions, right after blatantly kicking the ball out of bounds when the other four players couldn't score.
Professional (or for that matter collegiate) sports were obviously not his calling, but avoiding real work of any kind, certainly is. (After all he’s the son of an elected official) thus he is currently working as a Hollywood extra, albeit in the Northeast. While he is largely unfamous now, soon enough could be added to the favorite parlor game of citizens of Rhode Island.
I am talking of course, of the six degrees of __________ (insert semi famous, in the real world, but rock start status in RI, athlete, actor, singer or disgraced imprisoned Mayor) game.
If you meet almost anyone from Rhode Island, they can connect themselves to Rocco Baldelli, Chris Ianetta, James Woods (I’m running out now but you get the idea).
Ryan’s goal is to someday be in that game, and not for having played high school volleyball against Bishop Hendricken when Rocco was a senior.
Pictured here is Ryan in his familar blank stare "working" in a scene for a new movie about a NYC subway hijacker starring John Travolta as a lunatic. Here it is difficult to discern what Ryan is doing or thinking, but you the reader can help.
a) is he staring at Travolta’s ass
b) Not doing anything heroic, because he’s a coward
c) Biding his time until he’s a star beyond just his own dreams
d) Disappointing his father because he is not using his degree whatsoever
All other options or captions are welcome in the comments.
Lastly, a shout out to my beloved Green Wave hoop squad for winning the south sectional and earning a trip to the Garden for the EMass finals. Since its been 13 seasons since I went a whole year without seeing a game, I guess we know I was as big a curse to my high school basketball program as I have been to my parents.
I have majored in bracketology since I was about 9, (thanks Dad) and completed my final core requirement to graduate last year by spending the opening weekend of the tourney in Vegas, “watching, just watching” games, so I think I have a pretty good grasp on the NCAAs. But it drives me nuts whenever I see the last four in and last four out column.
If you’re a fan of any other bubble (I promise not to use that word again in this blog) team do you feel better, worse, or unfulfilled after seeing that update?
Who has a cooler, but more useless job to society, Draft Exper Mel Kiper Jr. or Bracketologist Joe Lunardi?
With a 10 hour bus ride to Mississippi to look forward too this weekend I should have ample time to work on my fool proof Bill Jamesian pool strategy, that is almost guaranteed to have at least 12 sweet 16 teams correctly identified.
Who is the Dutch Al Michaels? and how do you say "doyou believe in miracles?" in Flemish?
See even teams ARod begs off of, can't win the big one. No matter what now though the US can't be the most disappointing team in the tournament. And the Sox get David Ortiz back a little earlier. A win win for all Amierican Sox fans involved.
Last week it was too cold, this week it’s damn hot, judging by the fact I look like a lobster from a weekend in Tennessee. But clearly my car has yet to understand the change in geography and with it climate.
I got into it the other day and the digital temperature said it was 39 degrees and had the snowflake icon.
It was in fact 77 degrees.
After a weekend in Volunteer country, I think my retinas are permanently tinted Creamsicle orange.
I finally saw the infamous Rabun county and the Tallulah Gorge this week. The scenery was incredible, but my god I thought the flux capacitor had been activated on the bus and sent me back 125 years.
That area of the world makes Vermont look like Manhattan.
So A-Rod’s having surgery huh, eh, he still sucks.
It was hard not to root for North Dakota St. in the Summitt league final the other night. They’re in their first year of Division 1 tournament eligibility, and they send out a full whitewash of five Caucasian starters.
They epitomize a Norman Dale coached team, rebounds below the rim, solid passing and screening etc.
Is it a stereotype to also announce that they lead the nation in three-point shooting? Is that kind of assumed, like Pitt leading the nation in rebound margin?
Were NDSU and Pitt matched up in the NCAAs there wouldn’t have been a more contrasting set of styles since the 1954 Indiana State high school title game.
I know I said it was hard to root against NDSU, but I did for two simple reasons.
1. I have family closely related to the University of North Dakota, and you’re only allowed to root for one, I think.
2. In writing the Summit league preview for Blue Ribbon a year ago, I picked Oakland to win it, and despite being a year late, I feel vindicated. Slightly.
There are plenty of good seats still available for the Braves home opener, and after seeing one of their commercials I know why. It was one of those fan interview deals, where they ask everyone what they love about the Braves, and you mostly got your standard answers of Derek Lowe, Tom Glavine, Chipper Jones, but there was one that stuck out.
The shapely blonde woman in her twenties who claims she loves watching Bobby Cox; After all there's nothing sexier than a 70 year old man waddling out to make 3 pitching changes a night
According to a recent study organized religion, in America, particularly those who identify themselves as Christian has dropped 11 percent in the last 15 years; meanwhile I'm praying before games, something doesn't quite add up
Driving to Tennessee though the mountains was like going through the Berkshires only for three hrs. It was basically every ride I ever took to Ludlow to visit a former significant other’s mother, minus the sense of impending doom and misery hanging ominously in the room.
So TO has been banished to Buffalo huh? That seems appropriate, there are only two reasons to go to Buffalo, one is if someone offers you millions of dollars and there are no offers anywhere else. The other is if a woman will willingly date, or have sex with you, and again you can't find anyone anywhere else.
TO has done one, and a friend of mine is the other.
I am glad we didn't have to spend countless days and weeks speculating that the Pats might swoop in. I would have eventually talked myself into it, but selling my soul like that would have only been worth it were we to finish what we started with that whole unbeaten business.
Now I can go back to hating him unequivocally; if Ralph Wilson has a sense of humor, or actually has gone into dementia (he is 137 years old and played before helmets) he'd sign Michael Vick too.
By request we’re adding more photos to the blog, and with that, is this week’s photo of my friend from college the immortal (only in his own world,) Ryan who hails from Rhode Island which he will immediately tell you upon introduction.
Ryan is the son of a town elected public official, and one of the great tacklers in the history of his High School football, from his safety position. I think the term yards after catch was invented to convince Ryan to play basketball in college. He also possesses a microscopic collegiate baseball era of 46.00 over 10 innings, in two separate seasons four years apart.
On the basketball court he was an excellent sixth offensive option for the EC Lions, right after blatantly kicking the ball out of bounds when the other four players couldn't score.
Professional (or for that matter collegiate) sports were obviously not his calling, but avoiding real work of any kind, certainly is. (After all he’s the son of an elected official) thus he is currently working as a Hollywood extra, albeit in the Northeast. While he is largely unfamous now, soon enough could be added to the favorite parlor game of citizens of Rhode Island.
I am talking of course, of the six degrees of __________ (insert semi famous, in the real world, but rock start status in RI, athlete, actor, singer or disgraced imprisoned Mayor) game.
If you meet almost anyone from Rhode Island, they can connect themselves to Rocco Baldelli, Chris Ianetta, James Woods (I’m running out now but you get the idea).
Ryan’s goal is to someday be in that game, and not for having played high school volleyball against Bishop Hendricken when Rocco was a senior.
Pictured here is Ryan in his familar blank stare "working" in a scene for a new movie about a NYC subway hijacker starring John Travolta as a lunatic. Here it is difficult to discern what Ryan is doing or thinking, but you the reader can help.
a) is he staring at Travolta’s ass
b) Not doing anything heroic, because he’s a coward
c) Biding his time until he’s a star beyond just his own dreams
d) Disappointing his father because he is not using his degree whatsoever
All other options or captions are welcome in the comments.
Lastly, a shout out to my beloved Green Wave hoop squad for winning the south sectional and earning a trip to the Garden for the EMass finals. Since its been 13 seasons since I went a whole year without seeing a game, I guess we know I was as big a curse to my high school basketball program as I have been to my parents.
Sunday, March 01, 2009
Tossing Batting practice…while wondering why no local news producers thought to pair REM’s “It’s the end of the world” with its coverage of today’s “snow storm”
Ok, seriously what the f*#$ is this? It’s March 1st, and I live in Georgia. Like the mob looking for a snitch, snow and cold just seems to find me during softball season.
There doesn't appear to be an Atlanta version of Shelby Scott. The Tv News folks seem to run the gamut from Token Black Guy, to Redneck homosexual, to bubbly blonde woman excited to make snow angels.
When the TV news stations aren't properly prepared for storm coverage, how can regular citizens be adequately ready.
I’m ok with the Stephon Marbury error, I mean era. We needed to do something, and him and Mikki Moore, though if there’s a roster spot available in April, I’d be open to Ainge inquiring about the availability of Maya Moore for the stretch run.
(Ok I promise no more women’s basketball references today).
I’m now resigned to the Celtics ending up as the two seed, and a seemingly more difficult road through the playoffs. I think we’ll look back and see that losing to the Clippers, and blowing that game to the Jazz will be our undoing.
When you give up 100 points to the Pistons, it might be just time to start working toward the playoffs, getting the new guys squared away and such.
I hope to god we don’t play anymore 1 p.m. games on Sundays the rest of the season, clearly the hangover isn’t quite worn off when we play at that time.
Let the Kevin O’Connell era begin!!!!
Matt Cassel, we hardly knew ye, but while I’m a little disappointed we couldn’t get more than a second round pick it’s better than $29 million at one position, and honestly we’ll see how much better Cassel is with Dwayne Bowe, and whoever else he has to throw to. (By the way, the Chiefs wideouts are so nondescript, I had to go to my fantasy football site to look up Bowe’s name. Despite the fact he was my leading receiver this year, and on my roster all season long. Now that’s some real live anonymity).
I am sad to see Mike Vrabel go, he as much as anybody was the heart and soul of a three time Super Bowl champion squad, and the very definition of a Patriot, playing end, and OLB, catching passes on offense, and playing Special Teams.
He’ll have a long career if he wants working tv and radio when he’s done in New England, while shilling for Giant Glass, and Ernie Boch.
I just hope he doesn’t undergo the full frontal lobotomy to remove common sense and decency that’s required currently of our local radio hosts.
Chad Finn’s article about the state of sports radio in Boston, wasn’t exactly groundbreaking news, but what was unique was he was the first person to tell it like it is from a major publication. I’ve been a fan of Chad’s for a long time, and I think much of his point was proven by the Big Show guys who just crapped all over him, and took things out of context to fit their own agenda in the aftermath of the story.
There was an article in SI recently about the Big East, and the author went out of his way to describe Jim Calhoun of being a product of his hard scrabble roots in….(wait for it)
Braintree????
I'm sorry I know I've been gone a couple months, but the home of the South Shore Plaza, and Archbishop Williams is still next to Milton, Holbrook and Weymouth right? It hasn't been moved to area between Dudley and Eggleston squares?
Ok just checking; I’m as big a Calhoun supporter as the next guy (which is to say more so than a Connecticut state legislator) but even though he did have it tough after his father died let’s not go nuts here; I'm pretty sure that had nothing to do with making him a miserable bastard at times.
Though I’m guessing his time spent at AIC (Almost In College) may have contributed to those hard scrabble roots. There is really nothing redeeming about Springfield.
I realize that the Commonwealth of Kentucky may not have Milton’s or a Men’s Warehouse there, but somebody please tell Rick Pitino to find a new tailor. And Ricky, if you’re going to rock with the Colonel Sanders look, you have to go all out, that means monocle and cane, sir.
If you’re KFC you can’t get much better advertising than that on a weekly basis, even I was in the mood for fried chicken and biscuits after the Louisville game today.
Walter McCarty is on staff at Louisville; I don’t really have a joke here, but here’s hoping his 6-9 frame is one day prowling a Division 1 sideline as a head coach. I’m thinking Holy Cross as the perfect fit, just so Tommy Heinsohn can profess his love on a daily basis on local TV and radio.
I miss Tommy Heinsohn, more than you can possibly imagine. The National announcers are just making me sick.
Mike Tirico is a jinx of the worst kind…every time he comments about a stat, the team immediately comes through.
The next two weeks feature trips to rural Tennessee and Mississippi, hopefully they provide as much humor as Georgia has so far.
It’s been 60 days in the south, and I still have yet to visit a Waffle House. Though yesterday I had softball in the morning, and I simply did not function properly without a sausage egg and cheese on a plain bagel from Dunks.
Ok, seriously what the f*#$ is this? It’s March 1st, and I live in Georgia. Like the mob looking for a snitch, snow and cold just seems to find me during softball season.
There doesn't appear to be an Atlanta version of Shelby Scott. The Tv News folks seem to run the gamut from Token Black Guy, to Redneck homosexual, to bubbly blonde woman excited to make snow angels.
When the TV news stations aren't properly prepared for storm coverage, how can regular citizens be adequately ready.
I’m ok with the Stephon Marbury error, I mean era. We needed to do something, and him and Mikki Moore, though if there’s a roster spot available in April, I’d be open to Ainge inquiring about the availability of Maya Moore for the stretch run.
(Ok I promise no more women’s basketball references today).
I’m now resigned to the Celtics ending up as the two seed, and a seemingly more difficult road through the playoffs. I think we’ll look back and see that losing to the Clippers, and blowing that game to the Jazz will be our undoing.
When you give up 100 points to the Pistons, it might be just time to start working toward the playoffs, getting the new guys squared away and such.
I hope to god we don’t play anymore 1 p.m. games on Sundays the rest of the season, clearly the hangover isn’t quite worn off when we play at that time.
Let the Kevin O’Connell era begin!!!!
Matt Cassel, we hardly knew ye, but while I’m a little disappointed we couldn’t get more than a second round pick it’s better than $29 million at one position, and honestly we’ll see how much better Cassel is with Dwayne Bowe, and whoever else he has to throw to. (By the way, the Chiefs wideouts are so nondescript, I had to go to my fantasy football site to look up Bowe’s name. Despite the fact he was my leading receiver this year, and on my roster all season long. Now that’s some real live anonymity).
I am sad to see Mike Vrabel go, he as much as anybody was the heart and soul of a three time Super Bowl champion squad, and the very definition of a Patriot, playing end, and OLB, catching passes on offense, and playing Special Teams.
He’ll have a long career if he wants working tv and radio when he’s done in New England, while shilling for Giant Glass, and Ernie Boch.
I just hope he doesn’t undergo the full frontal lobotomy to remove common sense and decency that’s required currently of our local radio hosts.
Chad Finn’s article about the state of sports radio in Boston, wasn’t exactly groundbreaking news, but what was unique was he was the first person to tell it like it is from a major publication. I’ve been a fan of Chad’s for a long time, and I think much of his point was proven by the Big Show guys who just crapped all over him, and took things out of context to fit their own agenda in the aftermath of the story.
There was an article in SI recently about the Big East, and the author went out of his way to describe Jim Calhoun of being a product of his hard scrabble roots in….(wait for it)
Braintree????
I'm sorry I know I've been gone a couple months, but the home of the South Shore Plaza, and Archbishop Williams is still next to Milton, Holbrook and Weymouth right? It hasn't been moved to area between Dudley and Eggleston squares?
Ok just checking; I’m as big a Calhoun supporter as the next guy (which is to say more so than a Connecticut state legislator) but even though he did have it tough after his father died let’s not go nuts here; I'm pretty sure that had nothing to do with making him a miserable bastard at times.
Though I’m guessing his time spent at AIC (Almost In College) may have contributed to those hard scrabble roots. There is really nothing redeeming about Springfield.
I realize that the Commonwealth of Kentucky may not have Milton’s or a Men’s Warehouse there, but somebody please tell Rick Pitino to find a new tailor. And Ricky, if you’re going to rock with the Colonel Sanders look, you have to go all out, that means monocle and cane, sir.
If you’re KFC you can’t get much better advertising than that on a weekly basis, even I was in the mood for fried chicken and biscuits after the Louisville game today.
Walter McCarty is on staff at Louisville; I don’t really have a joke here, but here’s hoping his 6-9 frame is one day prowling a Division 1 sideline as a head coach. I’m thinking Holy Cross as the perfect fit, just so Tommy Heinsohn can profess his love on a daily basis on local TV and radio.
I miss Tommy Heinsohn, more than you can possibly imagine. The National announcers are just making me sick.
Mike Tirico is a jinx of the worst kind…every time he comments about a stat, the team immediately comes through.
The next two weeks feature trips to rural Tennessee and Mississippi, hopefully they provide as much humor as Georgia has so far.
It’s been 60 days in the south, and I still have yet to visit a Waffle House. Though yesterday I had softball in the morning, and I simply did not function properly without a sausage egg and cheese on a plain bagel from Dunks.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
Tossing batting practice…which seems sort of oxymoronic tonight because that will be the only reference to baseball in this entire tome...
Emotional leader my a** I never liked that stiff Garnett, he’s wicked overrated anyway, just look at the stats they’ll tell you how successful they C’s are without him, stats never, ever lie.
Well the C’s certainly haven’t missed a beat (which is more than I can say for my own heart when I saw him come up limping) since KG went down, the schedule is a little friendly and having five games in hand is a good thing at this time of year)
The big news is the loss of Tony Allen…no really, really I’m not kidding, alright, if you’re a faithful reader you’re likely aware of my distaste for him.
What’s more surprising, the fact Tony Allen has 66 turnovers, or he actually has 52 assists this season? I’m not sure how we’ll replace that production. In the D’Antoni seven seconds or less system, how many Turnovers could he have? I think he’d rival the Maris-esque record of 366 in a season set by Artis Gilmore in 1977-78. Of course that’s assuming he’d ever stay healthy, he’s no Iron Horse (unless you count the iron he’s usually packing in Chicago restaurants).
In researching that stat, I discovered that Karl Malone is the all-time leader in career turnovers, somewhere the lone Jazz fan nods in understanding. I guess now the image of MJ stripping him in the finals, is a fitting description of his career.
But seriously, what’s more impressive, that he is the second leading scorer all time, or that John Stockton is the all time assists leader?
Is it safe to assume, after discovering these three factors, that Malone might have been the NBA’s all time leader in percentage of possessions In which he touched the ball?
While it will always be the Delta Center to me, the home of the Utah Jazz is apparently the Energy Solutions Center, at least according the brightly lit sign outside the arena that TNT showed.
This seems to be a curious use of resources, and a rather ironic moniker, for the “energy solutions” company.
The only thing I'll say about the Jazz game is that Dick Bavetta still sucks. Oh one more thing, usually when a game is that one sided, I'd yell something wise to a ref, like...
"hey which kid is yours out there?"
Well in the case of Thursday, I'd be afraid that Bavetta would point to Jerry Sloan.
Steve Nash could have a lucrative second career as a Mexican Bullfighter. His matador defense isn’t even funny anymore, it’s truly a sham that he’s a two-time MVP, and thus almost has to get into the Hall of Fame, if all offense, no defense point guards can get into the Hall, then Designated Hitters should too.
I think it would be funny if some NBA DJ played "ole, ole ole ole....ole, ole" (it's in your head now isn't it, well hopefully it replaces the Giant glass commercial from last week) every time a point guard scores on him.
Seeing the evolution of Herb Sendek at Arizona State makes me nervous as a hopeful future college head coach. That man has not aged well one bit. If you showed two side by side shots of him at NC State and him now, they wouldn’t even look like the same person.
While it appears unlikely, if Bob Knight gets the head coaching job at Georgia, I will do everything in my power to obtain season tickets behind the bench, I feel like that’s an opportunity I couldn’t pass up.
However he would be missed as an analyst, he’s so awkward yet informative, probably what John Madden was 30 years ago.
I watched more of a women’s game than I ever would normally, simply because I was waiting for him to call them Broads.
Talk radio in Georgia can be hilarious at times, the sense of entitlement fans of UGA have is downright ridiculous. In listening to a show briefly in Athens the other day, the co-hosts had narrowed down the Bulldogs choices to Mark Few, Sean Miller, Tubby Smith, and John Calipari.
Apparently John Wooden has already rebuffed overtures. Their entire basis of argument was that all three are at mid-majors that would yearn for the spotlight. Well all three are at established programs that make regular NCAA tournament appearances and are often spotlighted in the second weekend of the tournament. Oh and hoops is a distant third here behind football and baseball. Yeah this is a coveted job.
The best part was the hosts claiming that there was no reason they couldn’t be perennial SEC East contenders within two years, despite Florida, Tennesee and a small little hoops school in Kentucky all above them. (not to mention Vanderbilt).
Perhaps Pete Sheppard’s retarded in-bred cousin is a flash-guy down here, I’ll listen closer for a name next time.
A somber nod tonight to Milt Palacios, who after seeing Devin Harris' incredible gamewinner from halfcourt tonight, now owns the second mist amazing gamewinner in the history of the Izod/Continentel Airlines/Brendan Byrne Arena.
Emotional leader my a** I never liked that stiff Garnett, he’s wicked overrated anyway, just look at the stats they’ll tell you how successful they C’s are without him, stats never, ever lie.
Well the C’s certainly haven’t missed a beat (which is more than I can say for my own heart when I saw him come up limping) since KG went down, the schedule is a little friendly and having five games in hand is a good thing at this time of year)
The big news is the loss of Tony Allen…no really, really I’m not kidding, alright, if you’re a faithful reader you’re likely aware of my distaste for him.
What’s more surprising, the fact Tony Allen has 66 turnovers, or he actually has 52 assists this season? I’m not sure how we’ll replace that production. In the D’Antoni seven seconds or less system, how many Turnovers could he have? I think he’d rival the Maris-esque record of 366 in a season set by Artis Gilmore in 1977-78. Of course that’s assuming he’d ever stay healthy, he’s no Iron Horse (unless you count the iron he’s usually packing in Chicago restaurants).
In researching that stat, I discovered that Karl Malone is the all-time leader in career turnovers, somewhere the lone Jazz fan nods in understanding. I guess now the image of MJ stripping him in the finals, is a fitting description of his career.
But seriously, what’s more impressive, that he is the second leading scorer all time, or that John Stockton is the all time assists leader?
Is it safe to assume, after discovering these three factors, that Malone might have been the NBA’s all time leader in percentage of possessions In which he touched the ball?
While it will always be the Delta Center to me, the home of the Utah Jazz is apparently the Energy Solutions Center, at least according the brightly lit sign outside the arena that TNT showed.
This seems to be a curious use of resources, and a rather ironic moniker, for the “energy solutions” company.
The only thing I'll say about the Jazz game is that Dick Bavetta still sucks. Oh one more thing, usually when a game is that one sided, I'd yell something wise to a ref, like...
"hey which kid is yours out there?"
Well in the case of Thursday, I'd be afraid that Bavetta would point to Jerry Sloan.
Steve Nash could have a lucrative second career as a Mexican Bullfighter. His matador defense isn’t even funny anymore, it’s truly a sham that he’s a two-time MVP, and thus almost has to get into the Hall of Fame, if all offense, no defense point guards can get into the Hall, then Designated Hitters should too.
I think it would be funny if some NBA DJ played "ole, ole ole ole....ole, ole" (it's in your head now isn't it, well hopefully it replaces the Giant glass commercial from last week) every time a point guard scores on him.
Seeing the evolution of Herb Sendek at Arizona State makes me nervous as a hopeful future college head coach. That man has not aged well one bit. If you showed two side by side shots of him at NC State and him now, they wouldn’t even look like the same person.
While it appears unlikely, if Bob Knight gets the head coaching job at Georgia, I will do everything in my power to obtain season tickets behind the bench, I feel like that’s an opportunity I couldn’t pass up.
However he would be missed as an analyst, he’s so awkward yet informative, probably what John Madden was 30 years ago.
I watched more of a women’s game than I ever would normally, simply because I was waiting for him to call them Broads.
Talk radio in Georgia can be hilarious at times, the sense of entitlement fans of UGA have is downright ridiculous. In listening to a show briefly in Athens the other day, the co-hosts had narrowed down the Bulldogs choices to Mark Few, Sean Miller, Tubby Smith, and John Calipari.
Apparently John Wooden has already rebuffed overtures. Their entire basis of argument was that all three are at mid-majors that would yearn for the spotlight. Well all three are at established programs that make regular NCAA tournament appearances and are often spotlighted in the second weekend of the tournament. Oh and hoops is a distant third here behind football and baseball. Yeah this is a coveted job.
The best part was the hosts claiming that there was no reason they couldn’t be perennial SEC East contenders within two years, despite Florida, Tennesee and a small little hoops school in Kentucky all above them. (not to mention Vanderbilt).
Perhaps Pete Sheppard’s retarded in-bred cousin is a flash-guy down here, I’ll listen closer for a name next time.
A somber nod tonight to Milt Palacios, who after seeing Devin Harris' incredible gamewinner from halfcourt tonight, now owns the second mist amazing gamewinner in the history of the Izod/Continentel Airlines/Brendan Byrne Arena.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Tossing batting practice...while wondering if Ty Law and A-Roid are distantly related and have the same idiot cousin...
I want to be upset about ARod using steroids, but then I remember that he's never beaten the Red Sox so thus I'm less annoyed. All those guys will get their comeuppance when (or in some cases IF) they hit their 40s anyway.
With that said, there are a couple things about the A-Roid stammer-fest.
When you commit a stupid mistake that lasts three years, you're either; an idiot, disingenuously lying, or trying to keep the marriage together for the children.
A-Rod is either a) or b) in this case
Didn't the Yanks spring training home use to be Legends field, now it's George Steinbrenner Field? I'm sure The Boss is a legend in his own mind, but first he tears down Yankee Stadium, then he renames the spring training field, I thought old people were supposed to be nostalgic.
Former Bruin/Whaler/Hurricane defenseman Glen Wesley had his number retired in Carolina the other night against the Bruins.
I hope the entire time that banner went to the rafters he saw that wide open net he missed against Edmonton in the marathon ot Stanley Cup final we lost.
No I swear I'm not bitter
PS: F**K You Petr Klima, and for the record if your parents weren’t illiterate communists you’d know there are two E’s in Peter.
If Bud Selig were commissioner of NASCAR the entire field would have been brought back to finish the race the race on Thursday.
And you know what, all joking aside, that’s what I would have rather seen done. The Daytona 379 just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
They couldn’t drive in the rain? Really? That automatically disqualifies you as being considered the best drivers in the world.
I would watch intently if there was an event at Loudon in February without snowplows, in fact I’d buy a ticket and tailgate to that.
The ability to drive successfully in foul weather should be one of the measures of driving skill on the Sprint Cup series.
I spent much of the UConn/Pitt game trying to come up with an all-time starting five of white guys from UConn; so far I’ve got Jake Voskuhl, Travis Knight, and Israeli national team point guard Doron Scheffer. (and no despite the fact Rip Hamilton acts like a weenie, wears a face mask and has a killer mid-range jumper he does not in fact count)
Does anyone know of any Pitt fans? Or for that matter a Pitt grad? I’ve come across fans of nearly every major college program, but rarely do you see Panther paraphernalia when out at a bar (and by rarely I mean never).
I applaud Sean McDonough for calling out the officials in the UConn/Pitt game, and more importantly calling out the officiating in the Big East as a whole this season. He’s seen more Big East games than I have, but the second half of that game was just brutally officiated. One minute it looked like a game at Rucker Park with no blodd no foul, then the next their calling touch fouls.
If I couldn’t have already accounted for his whereabouts I would have thought Ed Hightower was joined by two Jason Harringtons.
Speaking of officials, I think Hightower, and Ted Valentine may each get more TV face time than any five major college coaches combined.
I cannot name a third major college basketball official, but those two are at more games than Dick Vitale.
And after I wrote this, there he was on TV Tuesday night at Purdue, from Hartford, Conn. To West Lafayette, Indiana; that man needs a better travel agent.
I want to be upset about ARod using steroids, but then I remember that he's never beaten the Red Sox so thus I'm less annoyed. All those guys will get their comeuppance when (or in some cases IF) they hit their 40s anyway.
With that said, there are a couple things about the A-Roid stammer-fest.
When you commit a stupid mistake that lasts three years, you're either; an idiot, disingenuously lying, or trying to keep the marriage together for the children.
A-Rod is either a) or b) in this case
Didn't the Yanks spring training home use to be Legends field, now it's George Steinbrenner Field? I'm sure The Boss is a legend in his own mind, but first he tears down Yankee Stadium, then he renames the spring training field, I thought old people were supposed to be nostalgic.
Former Bruin/Whaler/Hurricane defenseman Glen Wesley had his number retired in Carolina the other night against the Bruins.
I hope the entire time that banner went to the rafters he saw that wide open net he missed against Edmonton in the marathon ot Stanley Cup final we lost.
No I swear I'm not bitter
PS: F**K You Petr Klima, and for the record if your parents weren’t illiterate communists you’d know there are two E’s in Peter.
If Bud Selig were commissioner of NASCAR the entire field would have been brought back to finish the race the race on Thursday.
And you know what, all joking aside, that’s what I would have rather seen done. The Daytona 379 just doesn’t have the same ring to it.
They couldn’t drive in the rain? Really? That automatically disqualifies you as being considered the best drivers in the world.
I would watch intently if there was an event at Loudon in February without snowplows, in fact I’d buy a ticket and tailgate to that.
The ability to drive successfully in foul weather should be one of the measures of driving skill on the Sprint Cup series.
I spent much of the UConn/Pitt game trying to come up with an all-time starting five of white guys from UConn; so far I’ve got Jake Voskuhl, Travis Knight, and Israeli national team point guard Doron Scheffer. (and no despite the fact Rip Hamilton acts like a weenie, wears a face mask and has a killer mid-range jumper he does not in fact count)
Does anyone know of any Pitt fans? Or for that matter a Pitt grad? I’ve come across fans of nearly every major college program, but rarely do you see Panther paraphernalia when out at a bar (and by rarely I mean never).
I applaud Sean McDonough for calling out the officials in the UConn/Pitt game, and more importantly calling out the officiating in the Big East as a whole this season. He’s seen more Big East games than I have, but the second half of that game was just brutally officiated. One minute it looked like a game at Rucker Park with no blodd no foul, then the next their calling touch fouls.
If I couldn’t have already accounted for his whereabouts I would have thought Ed Hightower was joined by two Jason Harringtons.
Speaking of officials, I think Hightower, and Ted Valentine may each get more TV face time than any five major college coaches combined.
I cannot name a third major college basketball official, but those two are at more games than Dick Vitale.
And after I wrote this, there he was on TV Tuesday night at Purdue, from Hartford, Conn. To West Lafayette, Indiana; that man needs a better travel agent.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Tossing Batting Practice….while wondering just how awkward the monthly sales chart of the Vermont Teddy bear Company must look like the other 11 months a year…
Listening to various sports radio stations around the country in the last week (thanks blackberry) I have noticed one trend, the amount of Valentines day related spots are just overwhelming. But it’s hilarious to hear a middle aged white guy like Dale Arnold try to sell me on buying sexy underwear, a Vermont Teddy Bear, or some sort of internet flower order.
However, now that we’re well into week two of these ads, I’m longing for a perpetual loop of 1-800-54-Giant ads. (Is it stuck in your head yet?)
“We’re there when you need us, Call giant Glass….wherever you are call number..” ok I’ll stop,
I'd like to thank Gov. Deval for reaffirming the claim of Taxachusetts with the proposed gas tax. After paying a whopping 7% in sales tax on everything including food and clothing I was getting a little worried the name wasn't warranted anymore, but hey good luck with that massive 27 cents a gallon tax folks.
Danny Ainge said earlier this week that everyone wants a 7 footer who can shoot and defend, well I'll settle for 6-10 who can rebound and make layups.
Make the damn move Danny, any damn move.
Nate Robinson just completed the same dunk the average 5-7 junior high student with a little athleticism completes. The step on the fat kid for a boost dunk, in this case the fat kid was a skinny NBA player either way I’m not particularly impressed.
With Lucky the Leprechaun now deposed as the timeout entertainment at the Garden, perhaps Nate Robinson has a career ahead of him, once the fact he's a bad defender, undersized, and an asshole for a teammate catches up to him and he's out of work.
It always seemed a little implausible that a white dwarf could complete all those flying trampoline aided dunks anyways.
Memo to Nate, when you’re 5-nothin and all dressed in green, you don’t look like Kryptonite, you look like a black Leprechaun. I would have rather seen him don the glasses, and walking stick and try to dunk a ball spinning on his finger.
When you’re Lebron James apparently you can wear a bright yellow Mr. Rogers sweater and sunglasses indoors.
I don’t understand how that can be fashionable, and yet if I wore it, I’d continue to be a dorky white guy.
Friday night was the always retarded NBA celebrity game, which has absolutely none of the fun of the old NBA rock and jock, and lacks the 100 point basket. But I caught myself watching some of it (it’s lonely here in Deliverance, seriously, just check the date and timestamp of this post).
Terrell Owens won the MVP for the second straight year, while playing like the guy at the park everyone hates. He put up a Kobe-esque line of 40 something points and no assists, which also included zero pass attempts.
Stuart Scott then gave the obligatory All-star interview with Amare Stoudamire. When asked who out there he would most like as a teammate, his answer was TO.
Note to potential suitors for Amare, now that he’s on the block, anyone who identifies with the worst possible teammate in the history of American team sports, probably isn’t someone you want to give up a truckload for.
Neither is someone who’s 6-11 and treats rebounding like an allergy and shows as much interest in defense, as TO does in downfield blocking in the running game.
The Finals MVP award is now being named for Bill Russell, it’s the right thing to do for the greatest winner in sports history, but how did it take so long?
The one thing I learned from the Rookie game last night. If Kevin Durant were still in college he’d be challenging Pistol Pete’s record for points per game average, and would probably get at least 40 per. The fighting Sam Presti’s have a future down there, if only they were on TV once in a while.
Both Michael Cooper and Bill Laimbeer coach in the WNBA…see kids what goes around does in fact come around. I am content with that poetic justice.
Some hatred you never get over…I was legitimately pissed that Laimbeer and his duo won that stupid shooting game.
As Larry told him before his first all-star game, as he tried to shake Legend’s hand…. “Fuck you Bill.”
Seriously the best way to make the skills competition more fun would be if a referee was there to call carrying whenever they dribbled. Or have their college coach screaming at them the entire time to go faster. I could have beat Tony Parker, who looked about as interested to be in the contest as he was at a Desperate Housewives bridal shower.
Pitchers and catchers started working out today, hopefully they’ve got that take the flip, touch the bag, don’t get hurt in a collision down pat, and Tito and Millsie can move on to the old fake to first check the runner at third play tomorrow.
I just don’t understand why spring training has to last almost two months. But I guess it gives all of you folks up north hope that snow, and cold are almost gone.
I’m here to remind you it’s not…now excuse me I’ve got to reserve a tee time for tomorrow.
Sundays are a great golf day down here cause everyone is in church all day smiting and repenting things.
Listening to various sports radio stations around the country in the last week (thanks blackberry) I have noticed one trend, the amount of Valentines day related spots are just overwhelming. But it’s hilarious to hear a middle aged white guy like Dale Arnold try to sell me on buying sexy underwear, a Vermont Teddy Bear, or some sort of internet flower order.
However, now that we’re well into week two of these ads, I’m longing for a perpetual loop of 1-800-54-Giant ads. (Is it stuck in your head yet?)
“We’re there when you need us, Call giant Glass….wherever you are call number..” ok I’ll stop,
I'd like to thank Gov. Deval for reaffirming the claim of Taxachusetts with the proposed gas tax. After paying a whopping 7% in sales tax on everything including food and clothing I was getting a little worried the name wasn't warranted anymore, but hey good luck with that massive 27 cents a gallon tax folks.
Danny Ainge said earlier this week that everyone wants a 7 footer who can shoot and defend, well I'll settle for 6-10 who can rebound and make layups.
Make the damn move Danny, any damn move.
Nate Robinson just completed the same dunk the average 5-7 junior high student with a little athleticism completes. The step on the fat kid for a boost dunk, in this case the fat kid was a skinny NBA player either way I’m not particularly impressed.
With Lucky the Leprechaun now deposed as the timeout entertainment at the Garden, perhaps Nate Robinson has a career ahead of him, once the fact he's a bad defender, undersized, and an asshole for a teammate catches up to him and he's out of work.
It always seemed a little implausible that a white dwarf could complete all those flying trampoline aided dunks anyways.
Memo to Nate, when you’re 5-nothin and all dressed in green, you don’t look like Kryptonite, you look like a black Leprechaun. I would have rather seen him don the glasses, and walking stick and try to dunk a ball spinning on his finger.
When you’re Lebron James apparently you can wear a bright yellow Mr. Rogers sweater and sunglasses indoors.
I don’t understand how that can be fashionable, and yet if I wore it, I’d continue to be a dorky white guy.
Friday night was the always retarded NBA celebrity game, which has absolutely none of the fun of the old NBA rock and jock, and lacks the 100 point basket. But I caught myself watching some of it (it’s lonely here in Deliverance, seriously, just check the date and timestamp of this post).
Terrell Owens won the MVP for the second straight year, while playing like the guy at the park everyone hates. He put up a Kobe-esque line of 40 something points and no assists, which also included zero pass attempts.
Stuart Scott then gave the obligatory All-star interview with Amare Stoudamire. When asked who out there he would most like as a teammate, his answer was TO.
Note to potential suitors for Amare, now that he’s on the block, anyone who identifies with the worst possible teammate in the history of American team sports, probably isn’t someone you want to give up a truckload for.
Neither is someone who’s 6-11 and treats rebounding like an allergy and shows as much interest in defense, as TO does in downfield blocking in the running game.
The Finals MVP award is now being named for Bill Russell, it’s the right thing to do for the greatest winner in sports history, but how did it take so long?
The one thing I learned from the Rookie game last night. If Kevin Durant were still in college he’d be challenging Pistol Pete’s record for points per game average, and would probably get at least 40 per. The fighting Sam Presti’s have a future down there, if only they were on TV once in a while.
Both Michael Cooper and Bill Laimbeer coach in the WNBA…see kids what goes around does in fact come around. I am content with that poetic justice.
Some hatred you never get over…I was legitimately pissed that Laimbeer and his duo won that stupid shooting game.
As Larry told him before his first all-star game, as he tried to shake Legend’s hand…. “Fuck you Bill.”
Seriously the best way to make the skills competition more fun would be if a referee was there to call carrying whenever they dribbled. Or have their college coach screaming at them the entire time to go faster. I could have beat Tony Parker, who looked about as interested to be in the contest as he was at a Desperate Housewives bridal shower.
Pitchers and catchers started working out today, hopefully they’ve got that take the flip, touch the bag, don’t get hurt in a collision down pat, and Tito and Millsie can move on to the old fake to first check the runner at third play tomorrow.
I just don’t understand why spring training has to last almost two months. But I guess it gives all of you folks up north hope that snow, and cold are almost gone.
I’m here to remind you it’s not…now excuse me I’ve got to reserve a tee time for tomorrow.
Sundays are a great golf day down here cause everyone is in church all day smiting and repenting things.
